Pregnancy Scare Resources

When someone comes into our direct services with a pregnancy⁠ (pregnancy: The state of carrying a developing embryo or fetus within the uterus. Medically, someone is considered to be pregnant when an egg has been fertilized by sperm, cells divide, and the fertilized egg is implanted within the lining of the uterus.) scare, there are some things that we will and won't do.

We absolutely will help users who could clearly be or may soon become pregnant: with things like how to access emergency contraception⁠ (emergency contraception: A method of contraception used to prevent pregnancy after sex or rape has already occurred, rather than used before or during, like most types of contraception. Includes emergency contraception pills and IUDs.) , abortion⁠ (abortion: A procedure to intentionally end a pregnancy before a birth. Miscarriage is also sometimes called "spontaneous abortion," even though it is usually not intended.) , adoption or prenatal care, how to talk with partners about and access contraception⁠ (contraception: Devices, medications or behaviors used to intentionally aim to prevent pregnancy, including the condom, the cervical barrier, the implant, the patch, the pill, the rhythm method, the ring, the shot, the IUD, spermicide and withdrawal.) , setting limits and boundaries moving forward, and social or emotional needs.

For those who come in with pregnancy scares who, based on what they have told us, absolutely could not be or become pregnant, or who otherwise are not or have not been directly involved with an actual pregnancy: we are happy to talk with you, but we will not engage in ongoing or repeat conversations to validate that you or a partner⁠ (partner: In a sexual context, a person with whom someone is having some kind of sex. The term "partner" can be used for all kinds of relationships, not just serious ones. "Partner" can also mean the person someone is with in a romantic or familial partnership.) are not pregnant,  nor explain repeatedly how pregnancy can or can't occur. To find out⁠ (out: Short for ‘out of the closet’. When someone’s LGBTQ+ identity is known to other people.) more about why, and what kinds of discussions we can and will engage with around pregnancy, click here.

We provide a great deal of static content on the site that can help people in pregnancy scares, including those whose fears are based in things other than there being an actual or likely pregnancy. 

Below is a curated list of links to information and help on our site and elsewhere that are about, or often part of, pregnancy fears or anxiety people are experiencing who are not pregnant, including factual information about reproduction, contraception, and what does and does not present pregnancy risks; self-help with managing stress, anxiety or fear; or content to help you with issues that may are often the why of pregnancy scares or fears, like unhealthy relationships or sexual⁠ (sexual: About or relating in some way to sex or sexuality.) dynamics, doing sexual things someone doesn't want or feel ready for, and not setting limits and boundaries with sex⁠ (sex: Different things people choose to do to actively express or enact sexuality and sexual feelings; often this involves genitals, but not always. ) a person wants or needs.

What to do if you're having a pregnancy scare:

• The Pregnancy Panic Companion

Education about how human reproduction works (and how it doesn't), including what kinds of contact do and do not present possible risks of pregnancy:

• Can I Get Pregnant, or Get or Pass On an STI From That?
• Human Reproduction: A Seafarer's Guide
• Who's Afraid of Sperm Cells?
• You Cannot Become Pregnant When You Have Pants On
• Have a Little Faith in BC

How to take a pregnancy test⁠ (pregnancy test: What we tell you to take when you ask us if you're pregnant. A test that can be done at home or by a healthcare provider to determine pregnancy. Usually a urine test, a pregnancy test measures for a specific hormone, hCG, only produced with pregnancy.) , and how pregnancy tests work:

• Peeing on a Stick: All About Pregnancy Tests

How effective a given method or methods of contraception ( birth control⁠ (birth control: Any number of methods people use to intentionally prevent unwanted pregnancy, including the condom, the cervical barrier, the implant, the patch, the pill, the rhythm method, the ring, the shot, the IUD, spermicide and withdrawal.) ) have been and can be:

• Cervical Barriers
• Combined Oral Contraceptives (The Pill)
• Condoms
• The Contraceptive Implant
• The Contraceptive Patch
• Depo-Provera (The Shot or Jab)
• Emergency Contraception
• Fertility Awareness
• Intrauterine Devices (IUDs)
• Spermicides
• The Sponge
• The Vaginal Ring
• Withdrawal

Estimated effectiveness⁠ (effectiveness: How well something works.) rates for any two methods of contraception used together:

• The Buddy System: Effectiveness Rates for Backing Up Your Birth Control With a Second Method

Help with self-care to manage fear, anxiety or other stress:

• Self-Care When It's Scary
• Self-Care a La Carte

If you are experiencing or otherwise part of any kind of pressuring, control or abuse⁠ (abuse: Purposeful harm or mistreatment of another person, which can be verbal, emotional, physical or sexual. An ongoing pattern or cycle of such mistreatment or harm can characterize an abusive relationship.) in your relationship⁠ (relationship: An ongoing interaction or association with another person, place or thing.) or sexual interactions:

• Does Your Relationship Need a Checkup?
• Driver's Ed for the Sexual Superhighway: Navigating Consent
• Hello, Sailor! How to Build, Board and Navigate a Healthy Relationship

Help leaving an unhealthy relationship:

• The Scarleteen Safety Plan

Help making choices with parts of life, like sex, that carry big risks:

• Risky Business: Learning to Consider Risk and Make Sound Sexual Choices

Help slowing down sexual activity that is unwanted or scaring you:

• Whoa, There! How to Slow Down When You're Moving Too Fast

Help assessing whether you're ready to be sexual with a partner or not, or if your partner is or is not ready:

• Ready or Not? The Scarleteen Sex Readiness Checklist

Help being more assertive⁠ (assertive: To be self-assured, self-confident. To stand up for oneself in a positive, nonviolent way.) , and less passive with limits, boundaries, and sex in general, and help with sexual communication⁠ (communication: Various ways we express ourselves to others, such as through speech, written words or symbols, sign language, body language, touch or art.) :

• Be Your Own Superhero: Learning How and When to Stand Up for Ourselves
• When Sex "Just Happened" (And How to Make It Happen Instead)
• Be a Blabbermouth! The Whats, Whys and Hows of Talking About Sex With a Partner

Help if you are convinced you are or may be pregnant when that is either not realistically likely or possible, or things like menstrual⁠ (menstrual: Having to do with menstruation.) periods and negative pregnancy tests have made clear you are not:

• You're Not Pregnant. Why Do You think You Are?

Help if you are worried about things you fear may be pregnancy symptoms, or have pregnancy concerns based on an app telling you you were ovulating:

• Chicken Soup for the Pregnancy Symptom Freakout's Soul
• Let's Dial Down Some (Maybe) Ovulation Freakouts

General information about chronic and/or irrational fear of pregnancy:

• https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/features/explaining-tokophobia-the-phobia-of-pregnancy-and-childbirth-9726809.html
• https://anxietyinteens.org/fear-of-pregnancy/

Resources and services expressly for and about those struggling with anxiety or other mental health issues, including hotlines and references to organizations and sites that provide qualified help with anxiety and other mental health issues, can be found on this page.