Who gets left out, ignored, dismissed or denied when someone states that sex, good sex or real intimacy or love should, can or does only happen within the context of monogamous marriage, or when any given couple has only had one spousal sexual or romantic partner in a lifetime? More than a few people.
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- Heather Corinna
- Heather Corinna
If he’s kissing guys but not you, that might be a sound reason to think about his sexual orientation. But that doesn’t appear to be the case. Our sexual orientation isn’t based on who we do not feel emotional or sexual attraction to, but to who we do have those feelings for. Of course, if we’re not…
- Heather Corinna
Unless her doctor was on drugs, wasn’t really a doctor, or was a complete lunatic, there is no way he or she would have said any such thing. Pregnancy cannot just magically appear, end and reappear all by itself. That could only happen in, say, the same world where that guy in the Santa suit at a…
- Heather Corinna
If you took your pregnancy tests two weeks after your last risk, you can feel pretty confident in the negative results you got. If you did not wait that long, you’ll want to retest when it has been two weeks since your last risk. It would be early to have pregnancy symptoms already from a risk two…
- lozzy57
What is self harm? How does it – and can it – fit into a loving relationship? Will I ever be comfortable with my scars? One self-injurer speaks her pain and her peace.
- swgal
I used to know God was real. And I knew sex outside of marriage was wrong. Then I lost my faith, and fell in love, and everything turned upside down. One readers story of her struggles to resolve her conflict between sex and religion.
- Heather Corinna
For men or women, sex is over when one or both partners don’t want to have it anymore, either because they both feel satisfied with the sex they had, or just because one partner or both, even if the sex didn’t result in orgasm, or feel like they wanted it to, just feels done with the whole works and…
- Heather Corinna
You can – and should, in my book – talk about this with him in advance if you have this concern. Neither men nor women lack the ability to be sure, when having any kind of sex with a partner, that we are paying just as much attention to them and what they want as we are to ourselves and what we…
- Heather Corinna
Condoms are designed and tested – each and every one of them, by every manufacturer – to be able to withstand ejaculation (what you’re calling “erupting”) as well as to contain a single ejaculation: the amount of semen a person with a penis emits when they ejaculate. They test them by blowing…
- Heather Corinna
Here’s a quick roundup for you. Oral sex is sexual activity between partners in which someone’s genitals – penis, testicles, vulva (vagina, clitoris, labia) or anus – are being stimulated by someone else’s mouth, lips or tongue. Names for some common oral sex activities are cunnilingus – giving a…
- Heather Corinna
Menstrual suppression is becoming increasingly popular, and has been widely promoted for women. For some, especially women with reproductive health issues which are helped by suppressing periods, it’s an obvious boon, and some using it electively also report it to be a blessing. But what about the health risks? What about the attitudes informing that choice which cheerlead suppression by maligning menstruation? What about the benefits, emotional and physical, our periods can offer us? An opinionated, no-holds-barred look at the whole works and a paean to the period, no matter what a woman chooses to do with it.
- Hollie West
Hi there, Depending how long this has been going on for, I think you both need to give yourselves a break. You may have other stressors going on in your life, and now your sex life isn’t working out the way it used to … This is a lot of pressure. And, unfortuneatly, the more you focus on how great…
- Hollie West
Hi there, I am so sorry you had such a negative experience for your first PAP test. I promise you, it is not always like this, and it certainly doesn’t HAVE to be like this. First off, your doctor TELLING YOU that you have to have a PAP test is wrong. A nurse practitioner (NP) cannot tell you what…
- Hollie West
Hi Kayla, While you can be sure that YOU have been faithful, there is no absolute way you can know that your partner has been faithful. Has your partner been tested for gonorrhea or chlamydia in the past? If not, there is no way for you to know that he didn’t have it when you started dating. If your…
- Heather Corinna
(Minny’s question continued) Still, I seem to be the odd one out and I find it distressing. I broached the subject with him recently, merely suggesting that I hadn’t actively enjoyed the way we’d had sex (not even that I disliked it) and he’d got very worried and hurt and said that I should have…
- Heather Corinna
Delilah: what you’re describing is most likely a completely normal physiological response to being sexually aroused. Part of female sexual arousal, much like erection for men, is swelling of the genital tissues due to blood pooling in the pelvis: the clitoris (both externally as well as internally)…
- Stephanie
It’s not likely for a person to be pregnant and still menstruate – especially past very early pregnancy – though some people will experience some vaginal bleeding (which is not the same as menstruation, or a period) during pregnancy. Part of the problem is that many people term any vaginal…
- Heather Corinna
The only person who needs to be convinced they are gay, bisexual, lesbian, heterosexual or any other kind of orientation is that person. We don’t need to convince others of what our orientation is or prove our orientation to anyone. That girl you know doesn’t need to convince you she’s gay, nor…
- Heather Corinna
There’s no reason why I, or anyone else, should try to talk you into doing a sexual activity you don’t have any interest in doing. Coercing someone into doing something sexual they don’t want to is an abuse, and in many cases, also falls under definitions of rape, and for good reason. What motivates…
- Véronique Christina
On July 1, 2008, I became even more of a proud Canadian. This past Canada Day, Dr. Henry Morgentaler became one of several new inductees into the Order of Canada (our highest honour). I think it was long overdue.
- Heather Corinna
(Jasmine’s question continued)I have no idea what to do. I mean it is just a little money…we’ve already had sex and now we understand that he want to be together for ever. He even told his parents about me, which was hard because they are as strict as hell. But I don’t want to give him anything…
- Nicole
Today I received my third and final shot of Gardasil, the HPV vaccine. A few weeks shy of my 23rd birthday, I am part of the first generation of women to receive this vaccine. I have to be honest: as far as shots go, it’s pretty vile. It hurt more than my tattoos did (of course, to be fair, the tattoos took much, much longer). However, (probably) being protected from four strains of HPV- the four that cause the majority of cervical cancer and genital warts- is worth it.
- Heather Corinna
How about something like this: “Hey, I know we should have talked about this before, but since we’ve been having sex without condoms, I need us to talk about safer sex now. I don’t want either of us to be taking risks when we don’t have to, or when we should reduce them, so can we talk about this a…
- Heather Corinna
As a product of the withdrawal method myself, you can imagine why I’m not too excited about it. But even if I wasn’t, what I know is that it’s one of the least effective methods in typical use (only 73% effective), and that even with perfect use (96% effective), it’s still less effective than most…
- Heather Corinna
Abba: this isn’t an odd question at all, and we do counsel users with rape and sexual abuse quite often. I’m also a survivor of rape and sexual abuse myself. Rape is a violent crime, and it is normal for any of us to experience trauma from a violent crime being committed to, on or inside of us. It’s…