Abuse

Lube can do some great things, it’s true. But you know what it can’t do? It can’t turn a lousy partner into a good one. It also can’t take pain away that’s being caused by a partner being a jerk. I’m so very sorry to hear about how your boyfriend treated you. But this isn’t about your body being a…

antogone68’s question continued: I think this was probably for a number of reasons: being busy at university and perhaps having a naturally low sex drive after the honeymoon period of a relationship. However, I also think my sexual assault had something to do with it. I still find physical intimacy…

I’m so sorry that you’ve found yourself in what sounds like some big time bad-news dynamics. There are some things where not being in agreement isn’t a big deal, or is problematic, but not massive. However, having conflict about sex and reproduction like this, especially if one person refuses to…

There are a few things you mentioned here that I suspect you wanted to have addressed in depth, but I think it’s really important that for right now, I do what I can to help you with what seems the most critical. I think it’s crucial you get some help as quickly as you can, and I don’t want my words…

I’m so sorry that this is how you have been feeling about yourself, and that you’re hurting so badly and feeling so fearful of yourself. I’m beyond sorry to hear that you hate yourself. Those are all terrible, debilitating ways for someone to feel. But I’m very glad that you’ve asked me for help…

helovesme31’s question continued: He used to smoke weed but he stopped cause I didn’t approve. I’m thankful he made that change but now I feel pressured into having sex with him. I lost my virginity to a big ass sleazy guy and then kept having sex with other men, they really were mean telling me I…

I was in an abusive relationship. Here’s what finally got me to leave and the story of my journey in getting myself, my child and my heart and head out for good.

I want to first tell you a few things you should know are true. Whatever it turns out your sexuality and relationships are like, whatever it turns out you want from them, they’re about much, much more than your abuse. Because we’ve been abused doesn’t mean either or both of those things will be all…

Anarchofemme’s question continued: So, to get to the point, do you know of any strategies feminist groups have used to make issues of sexual violence more accessible to those not already familiar with them? Would it help to focus on issues of gender and bring sexual violence in later as part of the…

I absolutely agree with you: that is seriously not okay. I do not think you are overreacting. Not at all. I think you had a very appropriate reaction, and I’m very glad you had that reaction rather than thinking it was okay for anyone to do something like that to you. In fact, if you didn’t get far…