Identifying Abuse

Was something you experienced or did abuse of some kind, or was it something else, like a bad or disappointing experience, misunderstanding, or unintentional harm? Here's where you'll find the resources to help you answer these kinds of questions.

Article
  • Maya Strong

For those of us who struggle with social cues due to a history of trauma, autism, lack of socialization, or other factors, learning to identify potential signs of sexual coercion or impending sexual violence can be empowering.

Article
  • Josie Gleave

What can sexual grooming look like in online spaces, and how can you protect yourself and your friends from it?

Article
  • Robyn Swirling

What is sexual harassment likely to look like in your life, or the lives of your friends? And what can you actually do about it, whether you’re the target of it, trying to avoid harming people yourself, or you’re the friend of someone who’s being harassed at work?

Advice
  • Sam Wall

Hi Jaden, It sounds like you care about this person, and that you're worried about her. You're also in a difficult position, because it sounds like both you and she are minors, and the person she's afraid of is an adult who's supposed to be caring for her. That may mean that if she reaches out for...

Advice
  • Sam Wall

You do know how to say "no" to sex. The issue is that you're afraid to say it, and that's a big red flag. I don't know how your boyfriend reacted the one time you said no, but it was clearly intense enough that you've done the calculus and decided it's better to have sex you don't want than face...

Advice
  • Sam Wall

I can spot one big thing that's making sex unpleasant for you, and it has zero to do with your brain or body being "wrong". It's got everything to do with your boyfriend. Before I go into why that is, there's something else that needs addressing. You mention someone abused you as a child, and I'm so...

Announcement
  • Heather Corinna

Another day, another famous person accused of abuse or assault. And with it, yet another wave begins of victim-blaming and denials from fans and people who know the person being accused of abuse personally or professionally. We've been here before, so many times. We're all familiar with the kinds of...

Advice
  • Sam Wall

Sparknolee's question continued: Whenever we're out, he says he sees boys look at me and he wants to punch them. I find this is too far as he even admitted himself he sees "hot girls" when he's out but has assured that he never sees them as a girlfriend. I understand that. Whenever he says he...

Advice
  • Heather Corinna

I wish that I knew more about your relationship and your boyfriend than just this particular conflict. It'd also help to know what a word like "slutty" even means to him. After all, slut is one of those words that's a lot like the word god: what it means to one person can be radically different than...

Advice
  • Heather Corinna

Lube can do some great things, it's true. But you know what it can't do? It can't turn a lousy partner into a good one. It also can't take pain away that's being caused by a partner being a jerk. I'm so very sorry to hear about how your boyfriend treated you. But this isn't about your body being a...