Sex & Sexuality

It sounds as if you’re concerned about your performance abilities, and whether your partner is going to get pleasure out of intercourse. From what I’m reading, it also sounds to me like you’re already having “actual sex”—indeed, oral sex, manual sex….it’s sex! And with sex comes the need for good…

There’s no sense in being anything but frank. Sex does tend to change things. It can bring about or illuminate changes in the relationships it occurs within, changes in our other relationships, and changes in ourselves. Often, we have to add some factors to our lives we may not have had to before…

One of the biggest facets of a healthy sex life with someone is being sure that we respect when they do NOT want to have sex, and that they do the same with us. Healthy sex has a whole lot to do with both partners only having sex when that is what each truly wants to be doing. When it comes to…

I absolutely DESPISE the term “foreplay.” Let me tell you why. That term states or suggests – structurally, it means “before sex” – that vaginal intercourse is capital-S sex and that every other kind of sex either isn’t sex, or should only exist to help prime the pump, as it were, for vaginal…

What you’re discovering is one of the many ways in which virginity as a concept often doesn’t make a whole lot of sense. Let me be plain: if you two pursue sexual pleasure together, however you choose to do it, whatever your bodies are like, I think you’re having sex; you’ll have had some kind of…

This happens. I know that probably sounds cliché, but you need to understand that no matter how old you are, how much sleep you have had, how much you want to have sex, how turned on you are, your penis is neither a machine nor an obedient soldier. It’s a part of your body, like any other, and just…

We get asked this question a lot. A whole lot. The trouble is, there’s just no way to give you and others the sort of answer I suspect you are looking for. But I certainly can tell you why I can’t do that. Sex – of any kind, whether we’re talking about intercourse, oral sex, manual sex…

If a healthy sex life is very important to you, I’d suggest you start by being sure you’re approaching sex with a partner in a way that is realistic. One essential aspect of healthy sexuality for ourselves and our partners is having our ideas about sexuality based in reality, and being sure our…

Let’s take a few minutes and break everything down into separate thoughts. First and foremost, you need to consider readiness. How do you feel about sex becoming a part of your relationship right now and especially for you personally about starting to have sex? Do you feel that at this point in your…

The short and easy answer: not everyone will feel so compelled as to moan during sex, so there’s nothing wrong with you. A lack of moaning does not mean that you’re not enjoying yourself, just as the presence of moaning does not mean that you are enjoying yourself. So now that we’ve knocked out the…