Sexual Identity

Have all of your straight friends had sex with a guy if they’re girls, or with a girl if they’re guys? If not, how do they know they’re straight? See how silly that is? Hopefully they will, too. It’s not sage to make orientation something anyone needs to “prove” with sex for a whole lot of reasons…

If it’s wrong for people to engage in sex with someone without knowing and disclosing all of who they are, might be or become, or will be, in any respect, including sexually, for all of their lives, then every single person on earth who has ever engaged in sex has been doing wrong. We could say…

Based on everything I know and have learned working in sex and relationships for many years, people don’t tend to have or sustain healthy relationships when they do big things for or with partners they don’t also want to do and feel good about themselves. Taking out the garbage, doing the dishes…

There are gay or bisexual men who love or like anal sex, it’s true. But there are also gay or bisexual men who don’t like it, or who just aren’t interested in it. There are heterosexual men who don’t like anal sex or aren’t interested in it, either. There are also heterosexual men who like or love…

Asexuality saved my sex life. No, seriously – I mean that. I will declare it from the middle of a courtroom, with one hand on Our Bodies, Ourselves. Asexuality, as much as sex-positive feminism and far more than any amount of “hon, you just need to get laid already,” helped me to access a confident, positive, and excited relationship with my sexual self.

Here’s the short answer: personally, what I call it is just being alive. The world can be a really beautiful place, and so can all of the people in it. When we’re observant, open, and not feeling horribly bitter or distraught about ourselves or our world, we tend to notice and appreciate beauty…

The way you framed this is tricky, because our sexuality isn’t separate from our minds and can’t be separated from our minds, just like our bodies can’t be separated from our minds. In fact, our mind is where most of sexuality really is and is what drives it the most. We can’t say something is…

Many people who identify as heterosexual have had some kind of sexual or affectional feelings or interactions with someone of the same gender, especially in childhood or adolescence. When Alfred Kinsey’s data was published in the late 1940’s in Sexual Behavior in the Human Male, a cultural ruckus…

I’m going to tell you a few things you probably already know, but they might be good ways to explain to anyone who doesn’t already know them. Heterosexual people are usually only or primarily romantically and sexually attracted to people of a different sex or gender than they are. That means that…

What’s it mean to be questioning, why would you or someone else identify that way, how do you deal in the process and how might you answer the question?