Pleasure & Sexual Response

Ways that we and our bodies can react when any kind of sex or desire is in the mix, including feeling good, enjoying ourselves, orgasm, or barriers to those and other kinds of sexual response.

Articles and Advice in this area:

Advice
  • Heather Corinna

The problem here isn’t your body, nor that fact that most women are just not going to orgasm from intercourse alone. The problem is, as you stated, the fact that your partner seems only interested in an activity which results in his own orgasm and his pleasure. That’s the big problem. That’s what…

Advice
  • Stephanie

While the experience was probably different and new to you, that doesn’t necessarily mean that it’s a weird experience. Female ejaculation (which is also called squirting, since not every person with a vulva is female) is actually a normal sexual response, though it’s not as common a response. So…

Advice
  • Heather Corinna

Orgasms will tend to last anywhere from a few seconds to less than a minute for most people, most of the time. Orgasms for people with vaginas often tend to last a bit longer than orgasms for people with penises – but for people of all genders, we’re still talking within an average of a few seconds…

Advice
  • Heather Corinna

Obviously, this is more of a personal judgment call than anything else. But personal ethics and the integrity of a relationship (as well as your own integrity) aside, you are likely to have some practical problems with not being truthful about faking and then expecting the sex to improve. I have to…

Advice
  • Heather Corinna

Honestly? The biggest fantasy driving the bus here is that the length of time your erection lasts has much to do with your partner’s pleasure (or yours, to some degree) at all. That isn’t to say that you won’t likely have sex partners – some, plenty, even all of them – who don’t enjoy sex that…

Advice
  • Sarah Riley

From a reproductive standpoint, the purpose of an erection is to allow for insertion of the penis into the vaginal canal and ejaculation. Once the erection has served that purpose, there is no reason for it to continue. Also, typically after ejaculation or orgasm, sexual arousal wans. As that…

Advice
  • Sarah Riley

This is actually a good thing! In general, the vagina is supposed to be a pretty wet environment. Even when a person with a vagina is not sexually aroused, they’ll have cervical mucus and other vaginal discharge. It may be helpful to think about it as being somewhat similar to the inside of your…

Advice
  • Sarah Riley

Vaginal dryness can have lots of different causes. Especially if you’re having dryness all the time (even when you’re not aroused or sexually active as well), you’ll want to first check out the other things going on in your life and see if there’s a cause there. Some medications and certain…

Advice
  • Sarah Riley

A couple of years ago, I learned to knit and I got really really interested in knitting. Anytime I was sitting still (and sometimes when I was moving) I was knitting. But then, after a while, I sorta stopped getting that urge to knit everytime I sat still. It wasn’t that I didn’t enjoy knitting. It…

Advice
  • Heather Corinna

We get a LOT of questions like this, every single day, and have for as long as we’ve been online. Here are just a few more recent ones: I have been with my boyfriend for the last three years, and just last May we had sex for the first time. I was a virgin, he was not. We have had sex on a few…