Identity

There’s nothing like starting to put together all of the myriad complexities, preferences and desires of our sexuality to point out how silly it really is to suggest that human sexuality, sexual orientation or gender can be easily divided into such tiny boxes, is there? The short of it is that I…

(Charleten’s question continued) Last summer, I came out as a lesbian to my family and friends, because after about a year and half of questioning and soul-searching and doubting and ALL that fun stuff, I concluded that I was romantically and emotionally (and sexually, though again I just am not…

For most people, whether we’re talking about sexual orientation or something else, trying to live a life as anything but yourself is more painful than living a life working to come to peace with something about yourself that you or others are uncomfortable with. Really, if you read the stories of…

There are a couple of common reasons why someone might hate being a girl: you might hate it for one of them, or you might hate it for all of them. Regardless, you get to feel however you feel and there’s nothing patently abnormal or wrong about being uncomfortable with your own sex or your gender…

The Biblical sin of Sodom wasn’t homosexuality or anal sex – it was rape, greediness and poor hospitality, and the legal basis of sodomy is not about homosexuality, but about oral and anal sex, and often about homophobia.

Hanne Blank is not a virgin. (She’s almost 37 and she’s been living with her life partner for nine years – we just thought we’d get that out of the way.) But she is a historian, a writer, and an expert on virginity, having written the first-ever history of the subject, “Virgin: The Untouched History.”

I came out of the proverbial closet when I was 15, in high school, and in the student newspaper. A sophomore had decided to print an editorial about the moral degradations of homosexuality, stating that God created Adam and Eve, “not Adam and Steve.” I was so enraged by this sophomoric (literally) editorial that I sent a letter to the editor responding on behalf of the gay community, which was published, and which publicly announced my sexual orientation for all the student body to read.

Have you just come out of the closet, or are you peeking through the keyhole thinking about it? Is life on the outside starting to look inviting, shiny and new? (Yes, even you back there, hiding behind that box of moth balls and Aunt Ethel’s spectator pumps.)

I remember when I was seventeen, I tried on some new ideas. One of my ideas was that notions of “right” and “wrong” were false creations of society, and did not actually exist. Yeah, it didn’t make much sense back then, either.

The more common meaning and implication of the term came to change around the 13th century and derived a sexual, sexist and moralistic meaning. With that change, the word now implied that staying a virgin until marriage guaranteed that a woman would uphold the family honor by passing from father to husband as an object that was owned – her virginity, her own body, was a thing of value that would be owned by her father, until such time as ownership of her virginity, body and sexuality would be transferred to her husband.