Identity

What our identity is in terms of our gender isn’t about what someone else decides or presumes–it’s up to us to reflect on our experiences and feelings about who are are on the inside, and to label that (or choose not to label it) in whatever way feels true to us as individuals. What feels right and…

The way you framed this is tricky, because our sexuality isn’t separate from our minds and can’t be separated from our minds, just like our bodies can’t be separated from our minds. In fact, our mind is where most of sexuality really is and is what drives it the most. We can’t say something is…

Be yourself, even if that means that there isn’t a label for you. Explain to anyone who matters who you are. You’re not your labels.

This month, as part of Scarleteen’s fundraising efforts, we have the pleasure of having some folks we love guest-writing for our advice section. For your question, I was delighted to be able to ask Hanne Blank to answer it for you. Hanne is one of the smartest people when it comes to sexuality…

Many people who identify as heterosexual have had some kind of sexual or affectional feelings or interactions with someone of the same gender, especially in childhood or adolescence. When Alfred Kinsey’s data was published in the late 1940’s in Sexual Behavior in the Human Male, a cultural ruckus…

Although I think of myself as South Asian, I was born overseas and have always lived in a Western country. Our family still carries many of our traditional values from back home and we have a large community here. I came out to my parents around 3 years after having my own realizations. The impetus for this was that they had started to look for marriage partners for me.

Meyli’s question continued: Last night, he went out with a couple guy friends, and they went to a fastfood place for dinner. One of the workers, a middle-aged man, touched him (can I say he grabbed his ass?) innapropriately. He was really freaked out by that, obviously anyone would be. It was a…

My family is supportive of my life, as long as they get to ignore the queer part. I know they can’t handle it so I don’t talk about it with them. As for my community of colour, the only one I’ve ever really been a part of is my mom’s church family, and I know they wouldn’t be able to handle it either.

Being queer and South Asian isn’t easy; being queer and mixed is harder, because any community can put it down to the OTHER identity group. That said, my Indian grandmother has been incredibly supportive, and no one has written me hate mail or disowned me. I’m very grateful for the internet, and for the time I’ve spent in larger cities. Both give me a sense that there’s someplace I might sort of fit in.

You listen to your own feelings and sense of self. You’re the expert when it comes to your own identity. While a sex is assigned to us at birth, and people may have the idea that also determines our gender, that stands in conflict with the fact that sex and gender are different words that mean…