first time

I remember a few years back when a close friend and I decided that we were going to try bungee jumping. I was petrified the entire time that I was being strapped into the gear and in the end decided that I simply couldn’t do it. As I stepped down from the ledge with my friend my body was shaking and…

That all depends on what having it be special really means to you. I know that might sound trite, but we’re all just so different, and what’s meaningful to us varies so much that not knowing anything at all about you before now, what might be special to you isn’t something I can speak to with any…

Some people think they’re ready for sex, but after they do it they find out they’re wrong. You need to ask him how he’s feeling about the experience. He’s obviously got something bothering him. He might think he’s inadequate because neither of you reached orgasm. He might be feeling guilty because…

Travis, it sounds like you do already seem to have a pretty good idea of what her concerns are, and it sounds like you’re doing a great job in trying to be sure that whatever you do is something you both can feel good about. In other words, I think you need my help less than you probably think that…

When something big is brand new to us, and carries risks with it – negative or positive, and in the case of sex with someone, both – it’s entirely normal to be pretty darn nervous or anxious. And when people with penises are nervous or anxious, quite commonly they won’t be able to get or sustain…

First up, I think you ought to rent a movie called ‘Real Women Have Curves.’ It stars America Ferrera, and is about a fat girl who has to deal with all the usual teen stuff: family, boyfriend and going to college. I think you’d identify with it and probably learn something from it. At the least, it…

It’s pretty difficult when we let our self-worth get tied up in whether or not we “satisfy” a partner (especially based on criteria like orgasm). Unfortunately, the only thing you can do is explain what happened to your partner and be as honest as you can (which it sounds like you have been). What…

As you and your partner consider sexual activity, it is great that you’re seeking out information and resources to help prepare you. It also sounds like you have been talking about this together, which means that you’ve already crossed a big hurdle that a lot of people get stuck on. So in order to…

The very first thing I’d say to you is that I hope you know and accept that it’s always anyone’s prerogative to change their mind or their stance when it comes to any aspect of sex and sexuality. Sounds like you do, but just in case you don’t, please know that it’s okay. It’s also okay to realize…

Well, it can be a big deal, and it is for most people. One thing that is important to understand is that NONE of us – not you at 13, not me at 37 – are ever ready and interested in having any kind of sex in the way you’re describing when who the other person involved isn’t known to us. I mean…