advice

The first thing I want to mention here is that I’m not sure there is such a thing as “a normal teenager”! Seriously, each individual is different, with different needs and desires, and so there is no one way to be in the world. The best we can do is make decisions that are well-informed and that…

What it sounds like, to me, is that whatever it is you’ve been doing sexually just isn’t something you feel okay with yet or good about right now. I get that it feels good at the time, but when I talk about sex feeling good, any kind of sexual activities at all, what I mean is sex feeling good…

We hear so many horror stories about first-time sex. Perhaps it might be good therapy to read about a first time that went well.

There is no one, unilateral stance on feminism and BDSM, whether someone is being dominant or submissive; whether women have partners who are men, women, both or neither. For decades, there has been a lot of feminist conversation around it and other aspects of sex with a lot of varied opinion…

You know people really are all very different, and usually when we try to compare one partner with those of our past we miss the mark by a long shot because of those differences. So lets break your question down into a few different parts and take things one at a time. Let’s take the big question…

Short answer: Absolutely, yes. There could be—and likely are—plenty of other reasons why your boyfriend does not want to do sexual things with you. Longer answer: Our decision about whether to have sex, or whether to engage in any type of sexual behavior is rarely the result of a single factor. It’s…

If I only had a dollar (heck, even a quarter) for every time a young person wrote into Scarleteen to ask us if we think they might be [fill in a sexual orientation here], I’d be pretty freakin’ wealthy. This is in no way to make light of your question to us, more just to let you know that this is…

A friend dying is usually a really big deal, especially when you’re young and death isn’t expected like it is when we’re 60, 70 or 80. While young people can sometimes feel like their lives are going to be short, I think it’s safe to say few people actually expect anyone’s life to end when they’re…

In American society we often grow up with baseball as THE metaphor to describe sex. Let’s deconstruct the baseball model, uncover its many flaws, and take a look at an alternative which is a whole lot better, even if it might make you a little hungry.

For starters, congratulations for seeking treatment and starting on your road to recovery. You deserve major recognition for that; it’s not easy but taking those first steps are so important, if hard, and I’m really proud of you! My quick answer to your two questions is that you are definitely not…