Period pain often feels inescapable.
When I was younger, it felt like some sort of cosmic punishment. But then, I was gravely misinformed about a lot of things when it came to the menstrual cycle. I had previously been educated on what a period was — it’s just that when it finally happened to me, it didn’t look anything like I had imagined.
When my period arrived in the summer of my twelfth year, I thought it was some kind of deadly disease, and I decided melodramatically I would tell no one: I would die, quiet, bleeding magnanimously. I threw away all of my stained underwear, until my mother discovered the mound of soiled cotton and said gently, “Do you have something you want to tell me?”
So I described to her, weeping, this terrible disease I thought I had. This affliction that meant I would never have spotless underwear again, this affliction that meant I would die unclean. Patiently, she explained to me that I wasn’t suffering from any terrible affliction — I had simply gotten my period. I kept crying, because it still felt like a disease to me.
I’m lucky that my mother, who suffered from severe endometriosis – a disease in which tissue similar to the lining of the uterus grows outside of the uterus – was extremely vocal all throughout my adolescence about the importance of treating my own menstrual pain as a medical issue worthy of diligent attention (and she still is to this day).I’m in the middle of the arduous process of pursuing an official endometriosis diagnosis (something that has thus far involved several doctor’s appointments and pap smears and ultrasounds, and I am soon to have my first proper endo scan) but for now the jury is still out on what it is specifically that causes me so much pain.
For my mother, though she tried hot water bottles, Ponstan, and even whiskey, things only really improved after she had her several keyhole surgeries. She said to me recently, “Sure, giving birth was hard. But I will never forget period pain.” That level of pain is not something anyone should have to experience on a monthly basis.
My menstrual pain has historically been capital B Bad.
I can now fully acknowledge this, though I couldn’t always. I used to try to play it down: “I don’t deserve painkillers, because I bet their period is worse than mine.”
Accurately articulating period pain is challenging for me because it is such a visceral, physical, wordless experience. But it often feels like my abdomen is going to collapse in on itself, that the pit of my stomach is about to give way like a pair of faulty trapdoors. On my more melodramatic days, I might liken it to a tree sapling growing inside me, branches unfurling, roots distending my gut. My body will constrict around constant, invasive, serrated cramps. The stabbing sensations will be so sharp that I’ll become saturated with nausea and my vision will grow dim, my insides so sore and tender that leaving bed is not always an option.
Ultimately, the thing about period pain is that it is all relative. You cannot experience someone else’s period pain. You are not in anyone else’s body but your own. If it feels painful for you, then it is painful, and it is worth attempting to lessen the pain.
I’ve known people who menstruate to refuse painkillers for a variety of reasons, but often those reasons fall under the umbrella of believing that they, for whatever reason, deserve to experience this pain — that it is their plight, it is their lot in life. I remember feeling this way while in the throes of puberty: I have a uterus, therefore pain is inbuilt into my body. When going down this line of thinking, it is easy to lean into a dangerous, tragic vein of biological essentialism, and to problematically view pain as being fundamental to so-called “womanhood.”
Pain is an inescapable feature of humanity — it is not exclusive to any one demographic of the global population — but just because you have a uterus or are perceived societally as a woman doesn’t mean that you aren’t allowed to attempt to alleviate the pain — especially, as is the case for many people who menstruate, when it can become deeply debilitating. If you are suffering, if paracetamol just isn’t cutting it, you are allowed to advocate for yourself —even though this is a sentiment that contradicts what many of us have been taught.
Menstrual health is recognized as a health and human rights issue. And it should be treated as such by you and everyone around you. The taboos and stigma surrounding it are outdated, cruel, and dangerous.
I think the first port of call is to talk with those close to you. Have detailed discussions with friends, family, and people you trust, both with people who menstruate and people who don’t. Talking to people who menstruate will make you feel less alone, and will also allow you to gain insight: maybe they overcame their pain a certain way, maybe they have a doctor they can recommend, or a type of painkiller you haven’t heard of that has been super effective for them. And it’s important not to rule out talking to people who don’t menstruate whom you trust — they still might have siblings or parents or friends who have had certain experiences that might be helpful for you to learn about.
There are many tried and true methods of lessening pain.
Exercising, if you feel physically able, can help relieve tension and stress in the abdominal muscles. Herbal teas such as raspberry leaf or chamomile may soothe the body. A hot bath can reduce the pain, as will a trusty hot water bottle. There has been some evidenceexternal link, opens in a new tab to show that foods rich in omega-3 fatty acids and Vitamin E can help lessen the pain: things like broccoli, chia seeds, walnuts, tomatoes, spinach, and edamame beans.
Over-the-counter analgesics can work wonders too. Paracetamol or Panadol can help for mild cramps [editor’s note: Ibuprofen and Naproxen often do better for managing pain with smooth muscle, like the uterus is composed of, than other over-the-counter pain medicines do.] . Anti-inflammatory medications such asibuprofen, mefenamic acid and naproxen sodium prevent your body from producing prostaglandins. For stronger pain or heavier bleeding, it is quite common for doctors to prescribe tranexamic acid.
If these measures do not work, your period pain worsens, or you notice new symptoms, go to the doctor — intense menstrual pain could very well be an indicator for something more extreme. Often, intense menstrual cramps can be a symptom of endometriosis, but it can also indicate other conditions such as uterine fibroids, adenomyosis, cervical stenosis, or pelvic inflammatory disease, for example.
Advocate for yourself at the doctor’s office: Scarleteen’s guide to dealing with doctors may be helpful for you if you’re intimidated. Being able to successfully do so involves being prepared. It might help to keep a diary of your symptoms, to keep track of your body’s patterns and cycles, to write out notes before your appointments. This will help you speak about your experiences with clarity, and will help your health care practitioner understand the specifics of your situation. Remember as well that there is always the option to bring a trusted friend along to your medical appointments so that you can feel supported and advocated for.
Don’t be afraid to get a second opinion. If you don’t feel like your needs are being met by your current medical practitioner, there’s no shame in seeking out another one. People shop around all the time — sometimes health care practitioners make mistakes, or sometimes patients (especially those with uteruses) can be misunderstood or can experience unfair pushback. There is merit in deciding when a medical relationship just isn’t right for you.
There is also a plethora of online resources that can be vastly helpful in terms of further understanding your own menstrual cycle and managing your pain. Scarleteen’s very own Heather Corinna, for example, wrote a fantastic guide to menstruation. The Mayo Clinic offers a simple overview about period painexternal link, opens in a new tab, and what issues intense period pain could be a symptom of. It is important to remember that one of the best things about the internet is the accessible education it offers, and this certainly applies to educating yourself on the multi-faceted menstrual cycle. It is, however, worth noting that internet is saturated with a lot of garbage and misinformation, so when it comes to researching menstruation, ensure that you are looking to institutional websites, advocacy groups, government agencies, and medical journals. Some examples of other trustworthy, informative health sources besides Scarleteen include Mayo Clinicexternal link, opens in a new tab, period.orgexternal link, opens in a new tab, Medline Plus,external link, opens in a new tab and Cleveland Clinicexternal link, opens in a new tab. And if the internet is not really your favourite place to consume information, most local libraries will have various volumes on reproductive and menstrual health — also for free.
It is so important to take pain seriously, even if it’s pain that you always thought was “natural.”
Pain can be life-defining, even life-ruining, but it shouldn’t have to be. Our bodies are strange and wonderful and enigmatic and versatile and confusing — we need to look after them.
