Masturbation is a topic you might need to do a little extra work on defining your values around if you grew up in purity culture being told that it was a sin—and that’s especially true during the pandemic, when pleasurable touch from others is not always safe or accessible to us and self-care has become more important than ever as we try to process all the painful things happening in our world. Self-pleasure can be an extremely important aspect of self-care even during non-pandemic times, and right now that is especially true.
Lately I've noticed my sex drive has kicked up a lot. For a few years I was sexually abused, and ever since then (and even before that) my mind has been very sexual. I masturbate a lot, watch a lot of porn, constantly have sexual thoughts (in general and about some people), and it's really scary....
Sex positivity should have given me the courage to ask for what I wanted. Instead, I thought it meant accepting what I got.
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We've all been influenced and impacted by white supremacy for longer than anyone alive can recall. Throughout history, white supremacy has idealized and normalized dominant identities and behaviors, and has shamed and oppressed those outside of them. Here's some ways this has manifested in our bodies and some ways you can start to dismantle that impact and reconnect.
Maybe you grew up in purity culture. Even if you didn’t, you’ve probably encountered and have to live with its ideas about virginity. I want to unpack some of those things, and consider what’s true and what isn’t.
Okay so I'm a 15 year-old girl and a virgin. I've never had a boyfriend or anything. My family's a bit Catholic and I plan to stay a virgin until I find the right person. But I kinda feel like I'm sexually frustrated and I've been thinking about sex a lot. I recently just started watching porn but I don't feel like masturbating. It's not like I don't wanna do it, but it just feels weird....
It's been a bit since my long-term boyfriend and I (girl) broke up, and I think I'm ready to start dating. The problem is that even though I love sex, I have trouble staying wet enough on my own that penetration doesn't feel uncomfortable. We sometimes used lube, but it was hardly a *sexy* aspect of the sex....
I'm 15 years old and a freshman in high school. I had no self-confidence in middle school and I have glasses, braces, and I have to get my eyebrows and upper lip waxed because I naturally have a unibrow/mustache. I really wanted to be thought of as desirable, hot, and sexy since I felt so ugly all the time....