obligation

A Sexual Miseducation

Sex positivity should have given me the courage to ask for what I wanted. Instead, I thought it meant accepting what I got.

He gets oral sex from me: what can I do to get him to give me some?

starriestknight
asks:
I'm 19 and have been with my boyfriend (also 19) for a little over two years. In the last year, our relationship has progressed sexually (but both of us have decided not to have intercourse). A few months ago, he performed oral sex on me. I'd given him blowjobs before and he asked if he could reciprocate. Afterward, though, he was really quiet. I got the nerve to him about it....

I survived sexual assault, then got stuck in a relationship I don't feel good about.

antigone68
asks:
I’m a woman in my early twenties and identify as a feminist. Last November I was raped by someone I had previously considered to be a close friend. However, the assault itself isn’t what I am writing about. I’ve read many of Scarleteen’s wonderful articles on sexual assault and I am quite comfortable with the idea that what happened to me isn’t my fault....

What if I never want or feel ready for sex?

Anonymous
asks:
Okay, well here is the thing: I'm a girl and I'm so afraid to be in a relationship for too long, because I think that I'm going to have to have sex. I know that my boyfriend right now wants it, but I really don't. He says he'll wait for me, but I'm still scared. I don't think that I will ever be ready to do it, and so I'm worried. What if I am NEVER ready?!...

He doesn't feel any desire for sex, but I want a sexual relationship

Elizabeth
asks:
My boyfriend and I are 22 and 21, respectively, and have been dating for two years. We recently moved into an apartment and now live together. We're committed to not having sex before marriage, but we've been doing other sexual things since we started dating. When we first got together, he was somewhat interested in oral sex (me to him, but NOT him to me) and touching and stuff....

He only wants sex with me after watching pornography.

Maggie
asks:
My question is my husband watches other girls get off on cam. I don't like it and he has been told but he still does it. He doesn't seem interested in me until after he has watched them. He pays no attention to me and when he is in the mood it's like after he's watched the other girls and I feel like I have to give it to him because I feel I have to....

He's new to sex, I'm not, and I think his values are killing our sex life.

Anonymous
asks:
I am 21 years old, and have a two year old daughter so am obviously no stranger to sex. My new boyfriend, however, is a 22 year old complete virgin. We have tried to have sex on multiple occasions but once we really get ready to go for the gusto he goes limp. All the rest of the time he is extremely erect....

Am I Blue?

Kaitlynne
asks:
I was wondering exactly what "blue-balls" meant for guys. My boyfriend mentioned it recently when he was complaining that I didn't go all the way when we were messing around....

I don't want to give him a handjob back: what do I do?

Anonymous
asks:
I am in a bit of a pickle. I am ok with my boyfriend fingering me, but I never tell him to, or even elude to it. But I am uncomfortable with giving him hand jobs. I mean, we will be lying down on the couch, and he will just start sliding his hands down to unbutton my pants....