identity

Sam shares how denial, internet searches, and queer media were all part of her learning about her sexual orientation.

Riss shares how reconnecting with old friends and looking at her own faith in new ways were important parts of understanding her identity.

Sebastian talks about the moments that helped them better understand their identity.

Ruby shares the experiences that helped them make sense of their queer identity.

Mo shares their own journey in understanding their sexual orientation, including how a certain cult classic brought them clarity.

Jack talks about the process of figuring out their queer identity.

Asher talks about how an unhealthy relationship lead them to some questions about, and exploration of, their sexual orientation.

The good news is that there’s no secret to bringing up unconventional sex acts with a partner; the same basic communication skills that are needed to talk about any other kinds of sex are what’s needed here. The bad news is…well, that there’s no secret to it! The simple answer to your question is…

Our identities and histories can be important and awesome, but they can also be a little difficult to figure out. What happens when your ideas about who you are clash with each other, or when you don’t feel like you fit anywhere at all? Perhaps you think you identify with words like ‘bisexual’ or ‘black/white’ or ‘man/woman’ but nothing feels quite right. Who is the real you? It can sometimes feel like everyone else knows who they are while you’re wearing clothes that don’t quite fit. Amidst that confusion it can be a struggle to navigate relationships with family, friends, and community. Intersectionality is here to help!

I hid my fears and insecurities by desexualizing myself. Now I’m on the path of uncovering ways to unlearn ugliness as an identity.