assault

Sex after rape. Where do I begin?

Anonymous asks:
Hi. First of all, thank you guys so much for being here; I've used so many of your resources before and found them so valuable, I really appreciate you <3 I am a college student who has had sex with one person before. This person was my boyfriend, who ended up emotionally abusing/manipulating me, psychologically abusing me (e.g....

Music With Lyrics: Finding Your Way Back to Yourself After Sexual Assault

The term itself is insufficient and sounds oddly trivial. The word ‘stealth’ has various associations in the Oxford English Dictionary (2020), including ‘secretly and without right or permission’, ‘clandestinely’, ‘furtive’. A stealth action happens quickly and slyly, like the swiping of an appetising sweet by a small child before their parent sees. But stealthing does not just happen surreptitiously, swiftly, or without the total awareness of the victim.

Late Bloomer: A Guide To Orgasm After Rape

When my assault happened, I was stunted in my sexual exploration, and I had no choice but to start anew. I’ve learned it will always be an ongoing battle for me, but a possible feat. Scarleteen readers confronting a comparable situation should know there’s hope for you too. Reclaiming our right to pleasure combats apathy by demonstrating our capacity to enjoy again. While we can’t reverse rape, recovery begins when we remember we have alternatives.

How do I figure out if I want to have sex? (Post-trauma)

Anonymous asks:
Is there a good way to figure out if you want to have sex? Two years ago, I left a relationship in which I had sex that was extremely physically painful, in which I was shamed and blamed for that pain and he threatened to leave me if I showed any "lack of enthusiasm". Since then I have not had sex....

Scarleteen Mix #6: Consenting and Other Sexual Communication

Real-deal consent requires clear, open and honest communication. And if we're going ahead and actually being sexual together in some way,  that also means an ongoing, nuanced and pretty highly situational process of communication, not just one or two super-quick, super-basic exchanges.

Not only is communication as a process essential to keeping it consensual, it's a big part of sex actually being any good for everyone involved.

Overcoming the Effects of Abuse

Silamy
asks:
I come from an emotionally abusive home that occasionally gets physical. I was sexually assaulted by a family member when I was nine -not one who lives with me, and almost no one in the family knows. About a year ago, I cut the strings on a friendship that had gotten out of hand and turned into an abusive situation. I have been battling with depression for at least nine years....

On Belief

I am tired of disbelief.

I am tired of skepticism.

I am someone who does, genuinely, believe in the value of looking at things with a critical eye, of being cautious, of acknowledging that there are two sides to every story.

But I am tired of it when it comes to people who have been, or are being, harmed or made vulnerable.