trust

Here’s the kicker: there’s nothing we can do or know which will guarantee that a partner will enjoy something we do. Nothing. One facet of readiness for partnered sex has to do with being able to accept that and be okay with it. Another part is knowing that no matter what we do, there are probably…

No, it isn’t. It’s not always true for men either, nor is there a sound reason why it would be more true for women than it would be for men. As well, if women have a female first sex partner, or men a male first sex partner, there also is no golden rule or given about if any of us will have long…

You just take whatever time you need, at whatever pace you need, to build trust with a new partner or potential partner. Being assaulted of course impacts how we trust people and makes it more difficult to trust, especially when you were assaulted by people who you trusted, who those around you…

It’s not bad at ALL to have laughter be part of your sex life: it’s ideal. Laughter is an expression of joy, after all, and ideally, sex should be an expression of joy, too. Nervous laughter is also okay: sex with a partner can make us feel anxious, nervous, or highly excited and it’s normal for…

Fantastic question! It’s so important for people to remember that usually when we’re looking to engage in activities of any kind where there are some risks of negative or unwanted outcomes, it’s usually because we also want to take risks of discovering or getting some positive or wanted outcomes. If…

When I was very little, I developed really severe atopic eczema. My parents and doctors had the worst time getting it under control, but eventually they managed to find the right set of lifestyle changes and medications to take care of the problem. I didn’t really have a lot of issues (as long as I…

Looking at what you’ve posted, and given he knows that not only does anal sex not feel good for you, it causes you pain, I’d be inclined to agree that there’s probably something very unhealthy going on here interpersonally. It doesn’t make a lot of sense to give someone tips on how to do something…

I tend to think the best way of saying I love you is…well, saying “I love you.” But if you’re asking if sex can express love? Sure it can. It doesn’t always, but it absolutely always has that potential. People being mutually invested in each other’s comfort and pleasure, each other’s sexual growth…

If you say nothing, it’s unlikely he’ll know. The bodies of people with vaginas really don’t change when they have any kind of sex, unless they become pregnant or contract an infection. Vaginal sex can wear a hymen or partial hymen away more, but so can and do a lot of other things, and at your age…

You know, genitals smell like genitals smell like genitals. A bit musty, sometimes a bit acidic or salty. And with women, because of the phases of our fertility cycles, and the changes in our cervical mucus and vaginal discharges during every cycle, that smell isn’t always going to be identical. You…