communication

It’s hard to say when things finally changed for me. All the pieces were there for a long time, waiting to fall into place, but I just wasn’t ready to let go and watch them tumble down. The idea of having to put it all behind me scared me. The idea of losing such a close relationship. Of losing something so familiar.

It’s hard to say when things finally changed for me. All the pieces were there for a long time, waiting to fall into place, but I just wasn’t ready to let go and watch them tumble down. The idea of having to put it all behind me scared me. The idea of losing such a close relationship. Of losing something so familiar.

Some helps and walkthroughs to create your own toolboxes and hone your skills based on Risky Business: Learning to Consider Risk and Make Sound Sexual Choices. My Core Inventory/Ground Zero/Manifesto for Sexual/Intimate Choices: 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. If you feel stuck, it might help to cover one bare basic…

Choices about sex and intimacy will always involve some risks, and making sound choices when risks, emotions and social high stakes are involved isn’t something anyone is magically expert at. How can we learn to do it well, and what are some common things that trip us up?

First things first: issues or difficulties with orgasm are extremely common, so you are definitely not “weird”. In fact many teens, young adults, and older folks alike have never experienced orgasm, so that’s great that you have found a position that brings you pleasure. People have orgasms in…

Have all of your straight friends had sex with a guy if they’re girls, or with a girl if they’re guys? If not, how do they know they’re straight? See how silly that is? Hopefully they will, too. It’s not sage to make orientation something anyone needs to “prove” with sex for a whole lot of reasons…

Life has scripts. Little socially-agreed plays that we enact rather than trying to figure out all our interactions from scratch every time. Many of them are very simple. There’s also scripts for sex. Unfortunately, the most common script out there is terrible.

One of the biggest messages I (and most other sex educators I know) wish everyone would receive and embrace is that when it comes to how you express yourself sexually with things like this, there is no “supposed to.” All there is, and should be, is what feels true and real for you, what you find…

If cunnilingus isn’t an activity he enjoys, and he’s made clear he doesn’t enjoy it and doesn’t want to do it, in my book you don’t bring it up again as something you want. He’s made clear it’s just not for him right now, and he tried it twice to see. He knows you’re interested in it, so he’s…

You know, anytime anyone says or feels that they literally hate someone’s body or body parts, my advice is going to be that it isn’t a good idea for the person with those feelings to be intimate with the person with that body. If we deeply disdain someone’s body parts, or anything big like that…