How to get over relationship nerves?
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How to get over relationship nerves?
I posted a question not too long ago about how I could ask out this guy I like. His last girlfriend cheated on him, so I think it would be fair to say he's going to have some trust issues. I also mentioned that I'm a little nervous about it, because I'm shy, and he's a popular kid. This is what I want to ask about. I'm not really confident in myself. I don't have any older siblings to go to for advice. Every time I think about talking to him about starting a relationship, I play it out in my head, and it always ends with him thinking I'm weird or something. I have a few classes with him, but I honestly don't even know if he notices me. Is there something I could do that would maybe get his attention (if I don't have it already), and then lead that into a conversation?
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Re: How to get over relationship nerves?
I'd personally start with lowering the stakes. a lot. I would not talk to him about starting a relationship, I'd simply say 'So, I was wondering... wanna go out some time?' and see how he reacts. It's much less loaded than making this about a relationship, it's just about possibly going out, there's not a whole lot to lose here!
And then, if he does say yes, you can go out and get to know each other a little, and you'll probably find out over time whether a relationship with this guy is something you might be interested in.
You don't know each other yet, so who knows, really?
And then, if he does say yes, you can go out and get to know each other a little, and you'll probably find out over time whether a relationship with this guy is something you might be interested in.
You don't know each other yet, so who knows, really?
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Re: How to get over relationship nerves?
Hi Volleygirl,
I think Snorkmaiden's advice is quite sound (although Snorkmaiden, a reminder that this area is for staff/volunteer replies only). I think it can also help to remember that, unless he's discussed it with you in detail, you may not know all his feelings regarding his break-up or what he's looking for now. So, just proceeding openly with no big expectations of his reaction (or of any relationship that forms) may help you feel less nervous about approaching him.
I think Snorkmaiden's advice is quite sound (although Snorkmaiden, a reminder that this area is for staff/volunteer replies only). I think it can also help to remember that, unless he's discussed it with you in detail, you may not know all his feelings regarding his break-up or what he's looking for now. So, just proceeding openly with no big expectations of his reaction (or of any relationship that forms) may help you feel less nervous about approaching him.
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- not a newbie
- Posts: 85
- Joined: Mon Aug 04, 2014 1:35 am
- Age: 56
- Awesomeness Quotient: I like to help.
- Primary language: Dutch
- Pronouns: she/her
- Sexual identity: straight butch
- Location: Netherlands
Re: How to get over relationship nerves?
(Oops! Sorry about that, Sam, I must have overlooked in which area it was posted.)
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