Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/ )

If it doesn't seem to fit anywhere else, this is probably the place for it.
Berry124
not a newbie
Posts: 275
Joined: Mon Nov 10, 2014 1:20 pm
Age: 26
Awesomeness Quotient: Personality
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her, they/them
Sexual identity: 'straight', heterosexual
Location: United Kingdom

Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/ )

Unread post by Berry124 »

Hi, I hope that this is in the correct area as I couldn't really find anywhere else for it. Anyway, I am in my mid to late teens and when I am on my period I use pads. They're fine and all but only recently I have realised how much of a nuisance they can be. I get quite a heavy flow I think so when using pads, I soon have to change them in like an hour or two depending on the day of course (don't know how long you can use them for but I never had the chance to find that out lol) but its annoying when I have to travel for an hour and a half to and from college every day. Plus, using just pads ruins my underwear, sorry for the weird description but it's annoying. Having to use pads is also annoying when you have to change them in a public area, as everyone can hear the distinctive rip of the plastic covering being unfolded, opened up, peeled off and stuck where it needs to go; then followed by you trying to get rid of the used pad :? . It's so embarrassing and you cant exactly stick a used pad into your friends or partners bin in their toilet, especially when they're the only one getting periods, so they would obviously know if it was them and my boyfriend doesn't have a sister. And don't get me started on how inconvenient pads are when you do Ballet. Plus to make it even more annoying, using pads can make me feel irritated 'down there' for a few days. :|

Because of all this, I want to use start using Tampons, however, I know literally nothing about them. What type of absorbency or size would I need to get if it's my first time using them, how long can you use them before you have to change them, and any thing else I need to know :?: . Thank you
Snorkmaiden
not a newbie
Posts: 85
Joined: Mon Aug 04, 2014 1:35 am
Age: 55
Awesomeness Quotient: I like to help.
Primary language: Dutch
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: straight butch
Location: Netherlands

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Snorkmaiden »

Hi Berry,
Here's a good article that may be suitable as a starting point for your research: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/bodie ... nstruation

Personally I started with Normal Absorbency tampons and went from there. That may be a good start for you, too.
Keda
not a newbie
Posts: 157
Joined: Wed Jul 30, 2014 2:49 pm
Age: 32
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm always nice, I just sometimes hide it well
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she
Sexual identity: Wibbly wobbly sexy wexy
Location: UK

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Keda »

Oh man, do I feel your pain on heavy periods and sanitary products. :P


I think probably the first thing I should say is that tampons may not solve all your problems. By all means, try 'em out, they might be miles better than pads: but tampons also need to be changed regularly (every 4-8 hours is the advice on the box), and if you have a heavy flow (or if you forget to change the tampon) they can also get saturated and blood can leak through onto your underwear. They also shouldn't be flushed - they can mess up plumbing - but, to be honest, anyone who invites around a vagina-owner between the ages of about 11 and 50 should be prepared for the possibility of there being a tampon or pad in their bathroom bin afterwards. Lots of people menstruate, and everyone knows that; as long as you're not running out of the bathroom, swinging a used sanitary product around your head and singing "Look at thiiiiiiss!", it's all good. :D

I don't mean to put you off tampons with that - I think they're great, much more convenient and comfortable; and less likely to leak, especially when the product isn't saturated but you're just moving about a lot, like in ballet. I just wanted to make sure you know what their limitations are. :)


The manufacturers recommend that you use the smallest/least absorbent tampon that works for you, but to be honest, I don't know why, except that bigger tampons can be more likely to be uncomfortable (but that should't be a problem once you've got used to putting them in properly). I'd use the absorbency ratings of your pads as a guide; they don't correspond exactly to the tampon absorbency ratings, but they can give you a rough idea of what will probably work, and then you can adjust upwards or downwards from there. You might also want to consider buying a few boxes of different absorbencies, since if you have some that are higher/lower absorbency than you usually need, you can use them up on days when your flow is lighter or heavier than usual.

For the first time, I would recommend getting tampons with plastic applicators. They're more expensive and less environmentally friendly than cardboard applicators or non-applicator tampons, but they're also a lot easier to use. Once you're comfortable using those, that'd be the time to maybe consider cardboard or non-applicator options.


There are also options other than pads and tampons, like cups, which you can read about here: http://www.scarleteen.com/article/bodie ... trual_cups
Also, if heavy periods are making life difficult for you, hormonal birth control can lighten them or even stop them altogether. If that's something that might be helpful, you could talk to your GP about it.
Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9542
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
Age: 54
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Heather »

Keda: that recommendation about the smallest size is important, because that helps reduce the risk of toxic shock syndrome.
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
Berry124
not a newbie
Posts: 275
Joined: Mon Nov 10, 2014 1:20 pm
Age: 26
Awesomeness Quotient: Personality
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her, they/them
Sexual identity: 'straight', heterosexual
Location: United Kingdom

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Berry124 »

Thank you for the site link Snorkmaiden and the brand you suggested that is what I use which is good I will look for them next time I'm in a store :)
Berry124
not a newbie
Posts: 275
Joined: Mon Nov 10, 2014 1:20 pm
Age: 26
Awesomeness Quotient: Personality
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her, they/them
Sexual identity: 'straight', heterosexual
Location: United Kingdom

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Berry124 »

Yeah my mum used to complain to my sisters when doing their washing and told them to use a pad with the tampon haha Yeah, my sister did that once, her embarrassed face when my dad unblocked the plumbing and pulled a used Tampon out lol xD In Ballet, you do move around a lot and there is a lot of stretching, which is a nightmare if your tights give you a wedgie and your pad is out of place :/ I have heard of Toxic Shock Syndrome and read it can be fatal is that right?
Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9542
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
Age: 54
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Heather »

Yes, but the good news is it is very easy to prevent. If you use tampons, you just want to use the lowest absorbency you can for your level of flow, and also only use all-cotton tampons without any other kind of fibers, and without any added scent or bleaches, ideally. Then you just need to be sure to be changing them often, and never leaving them in for more than 8 hours at a time.

Btw, I personally feel like it some ways it can be easier to learn to use tampons without using the kind that come with the applicator, because then you can feel with your hands, very easily, where it is going. But that may be one of those things where some folks find it easier to learn that way, and others with an applicator.
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
Berry124
not a newbie
Posts: 275
Joined: Mon Nov 10, 2014 1:20 pm
Age: 26
Awesomeness Quotient: Personality
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her, they/them
Sexual identity: 'straight', heterosexual
Location: United Kingdom

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Berry124 »

Oh ok that's useful to know thankyou :) I plan on using simple ones that aren't scented or bleached as I don't want to cause any irritation and ok I will remember that plus surely odour will be present after say six hours so you would want to change it anyway?. I have never seen an applicator on before but I think that it would be a bit hard for me to use for a first time surely anyway. One question, are tampons only to be used during the day?
Sam W
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 9879
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 33
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Desert

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Sam W »

I want to second Heather on the no applicator thing. I found it easier to use them without it.

For the sleep question, since you don't want to leave a tampon in for more than 8 hours, it can be easier on your stress level to just forgo them when you go to bed and use a pad only.
Berry124
not a newbie
Posts: 275
Joined: Mon Nov 10, 2014 1:20 pm
Age: 26
Awesomeness Quotient: Personality
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her, they/them
Sexual identity: 'straight', heterosexual
Location: United Kingdom

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Berry124 »

Ah ok yeah just realised that, makes sense haha. Thank you everyone for the tips and advice, If I have any other questions I will ask here
Berry124
not a newbie
Posts: 275
Joined: Mon Nov 10, 2014 1:20 pm
Age: 26
Awesomeness Quotient: Personality
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her, they/them
Sexual identity: 'straight', heterosexual
Location: United Kingdom

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Berry124 »

Ok soon tried to use a tampon but freaked out because I was scared as I couldn't fit it in as it got stuck and was scared it would hurt or wasn't small enough to come out :| I have never had sex so I am scared as I'm guessing it's very likely that my hymen or most of it is is probably still intact. Plus I was really sensitive down there this time so it wasn't comfy with just the tip of the tampon. Will it hurt? I want to be able.to use them but can't get the guts to put in more than one cm :( help! Any advice on like how to do it if that even make sense??
Redskies
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 1281
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 11:33 am
Primary language: English
Pronouns: they/them or she/her
Sexual identity: bisexual/queer/pansexual
Location: Europe

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Redskies »

The first thing is, you don't have to use tampons if you don't feel okay about it :)

Actually, it's most, most likely that your hymen (or corona, which is its newer, less myth-laden name) is not still intact. It's a myth that a hymen is usually broken by intercourse or other entry; instead, for most people, it gradually wears away, simply by living ordinary life. By 17, for most people, it will be more not-there than there. Check out our myth-busting information in My Corona: The Anatomy Formerly Known as the Hymen & the Myths That Surround It ! Too, the corona is immediately inside the vaginal opening, so if you put a tampon even a little way, that sounds like your corona has indeed mostly worn away.

A tampon won't get stuck inside you: so long as you have the string available to pull, you'll be able to pull it out. When you're having your period, the menstrual flow that the tampon gathers will stop the tampon from being so dry, so they normally slide out a little easier. On the dryness note, tampons are dry wads of fabric, which can feel pretty uncomfy to try to insert. It makes it a lot easier and more comfy to use a little lubricant on the tampon. Even something like KY jelly (which we don't especially recommend for sexual use, because it dries up faster than is ideal for sex - there are better lubes) or a cheap brand-name will do just fine for this job.

If you pause for a while with a tampon part-way in, that will probably feel uncomfy and weird. The vaginal opening and the first part of the vagina are much more sensitive than the rest of the vagina, so you'll feel something in the opening much more clearly than you would feel it deeper inside the vagina. If you're someone who tampons feel okay to (not everyone is, and that's fine), where it will feel "right" and not bother you is deeper inside, once the whole tampon is inside and above the hard bony bit you can probably feel just inside and at the front of your vagina. Most tampon packs also come with a diagram showing that positioning. If it felt like it got stuck, you also might not have found the right angle: the vagina doesn't go directly upwards, so angle the tampon slightly forwards, towards your belly. It can sometimes take a few tries to get it, so if it doesn't work, don't worry, and try again another time, if you like :)
The kyriarchy usually assumes that I am the kind of woman of whom it would approve. I have a peculiar kind of fun showing it just how much I am not.
moonlight
volunteer in training
Posts: 133
Joined: Mon Aug 11, 2014 9:27 am
Awesomeness Quotient: I do improv as often as possible.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Canada

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by moonlight »

Warning: i cant really tell if my post below comes across as rude or pushy or like telling you what to do. It isnt intended that way.

Hi, just dropping in to give my two cents.

I personally love taking things apart and knowing how they work. So I think it might help you if you open a tampon and examine it. If it has an applicator, push it out. Pull the applicator apart, figure out how it works. Examine the tampon, the string is likely woven all the way through it, so its incredibly unlikely to break off. Put the tampon in water, see how it soaks it up. Tear the tampon apart, cut it into pieces. Do whatever you want to do to find out about it.

Likewise, if you are comfortable doing so, examine your vagina and vulva. Notice how the vagina doesn't go straight up (well probably doesn't. All bodies are different) so shooting the tampon straight up is not likely your best bet for insertion. Maybe just try inserting the applicator to get comfortable with that. Don't worry yet about actually inserting the tampon.

Also make sure you're trying to use the tampon when you have time and space to feel comfortable. If it takes ten minutes (or more, or less) to get comfortable, insert the tampon, and be sure its in the right place, that is okay.

All of the above is simply a suggestion. It might help, it might not help. Its simply what I'd tell myself if I were traveling back in time.
Berry124
not a newbie
Posts: 275
Joined: Mon Nov 10, 2014 1:20 pm
Age: 26
Awesomeness Quotient: Personality
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her, they/them
Sexual identity: 'straight', heterosexual
Location: United Kingdom

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Berry124 »

Thanks for the tips :) I am exactly the same I love to find out how things work too! I am guessing that it doesn't just work first time and may take several attempts to finally get it in so I will just keep at it.

Thank you for the help Redskies, I did get it in a cm or a bit more so that makes sense plus I did do a lot of different sports when I was younger and Dancing so that has probably worn it way mostly. I have managed to get another tampon in before further but like you said it felt weird and I didn't like it so took it out. Guess I just have to practice.
moonlight
volunteer in training
Posts: 133
Joined: Mon Aug 11, 2014 9:27 am
Awesomeness Quotient: I do improv as often as possible.
Primary language: English
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Canada

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by moonlight »

I just remembered a mistake I used to make when I first started using tampons. I was using the kind with an applicator, but I didn't understand that the applicator actually had to go part way inside your body too. So I was essentially just putting the tampon in my vaginal lips and beginning of the vaginal opening, not the proper part of the vagina at all!
Berry124
not a newbie
Posts: 275
Joined: Mon Nov 10, 2014 1:20 pm
Age: 26
Awesomeness Quotient: Personality
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her, they/them
Sexual identity: 'straight', heterosexual
Location: United Kingdom

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Berry124 »

How do I know if it's completely in though?
Berry124
not a newbie
Posts: 275
Joined: Mon Nov 10, 2014 1:20 pm
Age: 26
Awesomeness Quotient: Personality
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her, they/them
Sexual identity: 'straight', heterosexual
Location: United Kingdom

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Berry124 »

Hi, I've tried to get tampons in and I am currently on my withdrawel bleed but I still can't do it, I can't go any further than about two cm's before it feels.uncomfortable, the material just dries up any fluid there is which helps to get it in and then it gets stuck. Plus I'm scared to put anything in or even touch myself even though (sorry for the information) it was fine when my boyfriend did manual but still only went about a two cm in aswell. With the corona bit it didn't hurt when manual was performed or bleed, so it most likely has worn away, but I can't get tampons in any further :(
Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9542
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
Age: 54
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Heather »

Sounds to me like there is a prerequisite here, and one that would be important even if you never wanted to use tampons, and that's getting comfortable with touching your own body and its parts.

Why do you think you feel scared you cannot safely touch your genitals, but you feel like it's okay for someone else whose body it isn't to touch them? What are you scared will happen if you touch your own body?
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
Berry124
not a newbie
Posts: 275
Joined: Mon Nov 10, 2014 1:20 pm
Age: 26
Awesomeness Quotient: Personality
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her, they/them
Sexual identity: 'straight', heterosexual
Location: United Kingdom

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Berry124 »

Well I just feel a bit awkward like touching my vagina, I'm fine with the other parts of my body down there but I feel dirty or weird touching myself there. I sound silly to admit that I've never looked or seen myself down there so don't want to like poke at anything or hurt myself. It's embarrassing the fact that I never knew what the clitoras (sorry if it's spelt wrong) was until few months ago.
Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9542
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
Age: 54
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Heather »

Well, awkward and scared are awfully different. Awkward is pretty easy to overcome, too: usually, all we have to do to feel less awkward doing something (and it's not like feeling awkward is a problem in the first place: it's no big to feel awkward) is just do it over time and it will feel less so.

If you trust your boyfriend, who doesn't even have these body parts, to be able to touch you without hurting you (and look at you), don't you think you can trust yourself? I mean, wouldn't you MORE trust, say, someone cutting your hair who had your kind of hair and also had years of experience living with it over someone who did not have hair like yours and had never even lived with your kind of hair themselves?

Our genitals, too, really aren't that different from other body parts. So, if you think about it, not looking at them is something someone would have to earnestly work hard to do, and wouldn't seem to make any kind of sense with any other part of your body. If you treat them like they're different, you are going to feel different about them. If you start treating them more like any other part of your body, then you can start to get as comfortable with these parts as all your other parts.
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
Keda
not a newbie
Posts: 157
Joined: Wed Jul 30, 2014 2:49 pm
Age: 32
Awesomeness Quotient: I'm always nice, I just sometimes hide it well
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she
Sexual identity: Wibbly wobbly sexy wexy
Location: UK

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Keda »

Maybe the old trick of using a hand mirror to have a look at your vulva, and then having a gentle poke around, might help? So long as you cut and file your fingernails first, you're really at no risk of hurting yourself - just like ordinary skin, you'll feel pressure, then discomfort, then pain long before you do any damage. Of course, don't do it if you don't feel comfortable, and there's no obligation to go any further than you want to - I don't want to push you into anything. Seeing what you're doing might be a bit less nerve-wracking than going in blind, so to speak. :P
Berry124
not a newbie
Posts: 275
Joined: Mon Nov 10, 2014 1:20 pm
Age: 26
Awesomeness Quotient: Personality
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her, they/them
Sexual identity: 'straight', heterosexual
Location: United Kingdom

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Berry124 »

Thank you, yeah I just don't exactly have eyes on my hands no haha. Yeah I make sure that if fingers were poking around, long, sharp nails or sharp skin wasn't there to cause any damage. I mean when my boyfriend does touch me, I trust him and he knows to be careful, so I don't worry about it, but knowing me I will probably poke myself where it hurts or something because I am so clumsy :roll:

I just don't seem to like the look of my vulva, I mean it just look kinda unusual, but body parts do though I suppose.
Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9542
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
Age: 54
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Heather »

So, you have looked before then, after all!

Still not getting a sense from you of why you think you are okay with a boyfriend touching you, but not touching yourself.
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
Redskies
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 1281
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 11:33 am
Primary language: English
Pronouns: they/them or she/her
Sexual identity: bisexual/queer/pansexual
Location: Europe

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Redskies »

Have you seen other vulvas, either in person or in realistic pictures or illustrations?

There's a lot of odd ideas and discomfort with vulvas in society generally - demonstrated in the awkwardness many people feel about just the words "vulva" and "vagina", simply the names for body parts that half the population has. So, unsurprisingly, it's quite common for people to internalise that and feel like their own body parts are in some way weird, scary, ugly or icky. If you're not already familiar with the appearance of vulvas generally, maybe that's a good place to start?

If you think so, we have some resources on-site that you might like to look at. I think it's a good idea to look at several different pictures, to get more of an idea of the range of different bodies, too.

*If you're in a public place, please be aware that these links all have explicit, large(ish) pictures of genitals. I think it's cool, but maybe the person behind you wouldn't!*

http://www.scarleteen.com/resource/advi ... ustrations (detailed drawings)
http://www.scarleteen.com/blog/heather_ ... mine_blink (photographs; links at the bottom to others in the series)
The kyriarchy usually assumes that I am the kind of woman of whom it would approve. I have a peculiar kind of fun showing it just how much I am not.
Berry124
not a newbie
Posts: 275
Joined: Mon Nov 10, 2014 1:20 pm
Age: 26
Awesomeness Quotient: Personality
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her, they/them
Sexual identity: 'straight', heterosexual
Location: United Kingdom

Re: Advice and help on Tampons (I know nothing about them :/

Unread post by Berry124 »

No I haven't, I have no idea if mine is normal as it is as for a start I can't seem to use tampons as nothing fits actually more than 1-2cm up there.

With what Heather said, It's not that I don't like to touch myself in that area, I just don't know why I don't like to touch it there I don't mind my boyfriend touching me there as I am comfortable with him and it didn't hurt or anything so there wasn't a like negative experience when he did touch me there.
Thankyou, I'm at home.so it should be fine with the pictures. I will have a look at the links.
Post Reply Previous topicNext topic
  • Similar Topics
    Replies
    Views
    Last post