Have you considered types of you-time that would be fun for you but would also keep your mind busy? Such as reading a book that is not school-related or doing a puzzle (I really enjoy nonograms lately)? Alternatively, you can try to channel those feelings of fear into something creative. I know you'...

Please don't apologize to me about not having gotten into the groove with self-care yet. You don't answer to me and yo don't owe me anything - I am just here to listen and make a suggestion here and there. What you do with that is up to you. This is your healing process and you get to call the shots...

Self-blame is a very tempting and easy place to go when you've been treated badly. For one thing, it can be hard to reconcile the image of someone you care about a whole lot with the image of someone who hurt you. It sucks when we have to realize that someone we love was bad for us. And for another ...

Well, I don't know their side of these guys' stories. I am also not talking to them, I am here for you and to talk to you, so how they are feeling is not something I am concerned with. But as far as I can tell, you are the one who was sexually assaulted, and you were also the one who was having sex ...

I don't know who you mean by "anybody else involved", but I do know that we all react differently to the things that happen to us. We are all different people, with different histories, defenses and coping mechanisms. Something you may feel is no big deal might knock another person out, an...

I don't think you are doing it wrong at all - feelings like this don't go away in just a day or two of dealing with them. Coping with depression, low self-esteem and sexual abuse isn't something that's easy, or that happens all at once. You are off to a great start by opening up here and being willi...

I want to repeat, again, that what you've posted here certainly qualifies as a difficult situation. I also don't think that you're at all weak - you're here with us working through some tough emotions, and you also appear to be a very smart, ambitious young person. (And you know, whoever told you th...

Welcome to Scarleteen, m.m.s. So it looks like you're learning that the libido can be very unpredictable, and is not constant and static. It's perfectly normal for sexual desire to come and go, and for us to have times in our lives when we're feeling super sexual, and times when we're feeling less i...

I have been talking to you since yesterday, and I don't at all feel like you're making a big deal. I think you're struggling with some really tough stuff, and your problems are fully as important as other people's problems, and you are 100% deserving of getting help. I know you're not ready to hear ...

You know, it's actually not totally uncommon for people who are going through stuff to minimize what they are going through, and to feel like their situation is not "as bad" as that of other people. On the one hand, it can be part of trying to repress your feelings: if you can convince you...

I actually volunteer at a hotline for abuse survivors, and I can tell you that, if I were to be talking to you on the line, I would not feel at all like you're taking up time, or tying up the line for "someone who needs it". If you are going through tough stuff and want to talk to someone?...

(I'm back for a little while, but it looks like Sam's got you covered! I do want to throw one thing out there: I noticed that you are talking a lot about how busy you are, and that you don't have a lot of time for self-care. And if you're super stressed, to the point of only getting a few hours of s...

Have you ever received any professional help for your low self-esteem and depression? If not, are you at all open to a conversation about obtaining help? Thank you for writing all of that out, and for trusting us with your story. One thing that stands out to me is that you talk a lot about wanting t...

I don't know that there is ever an ideal time to deal with negative feelings. It sucks to have to make time for that, and I completely understand your feelings of resentment towards that. I think a good place to start would be for your to think about the questions I posted further up in the thread, ...

Working through something is almost definitely going to make you feel pretty anxious at the start. After all, feelings that need working through and processing are usually pretty big and uncomfortable - that is why they need processing in the first place. But that is also pretty much the only way to...

Regardless of who is responsible for what happened, you are feeling badly now, and no one deserves to feel badly. I hear from your posts that you are feeling overwhelmed, and if you are interested, we can help you find ways to get some help, including finding local resources for professional help. B...

I don't think you are overreacting at all, hawley. If you felt the feelings you described, then you felt them. Your feelings are valid. I am not sorry that you posted here, and I think it is absolutely worth it to talk about what you are feeling. I'm still here to talk to you about this and try to h...

In either of the relationships, did you feel comfortable with your partner? Did you have an honest relationship in which you discussed wants and needs, as well as boundaries? Were you able to communicate freely about sex, and did you do so before you became sexually active? A safe environment is one...

Given what you are saying about both of those relationships, I am not really surprised that you're experiencing feelings of fear in sexual situations. Neither of those relationships sound like they were safe spaces in wich you could explore your sexuality. If we experience a lot of negative feedback...

Welcome to Scarleteen, hawley! I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling so much fear. Let's see if we can help you figure out what's going on. First things first, regarding the situation that you described in the first paragraph: I think your intincts are spot-on. What happened was not okay. You were u...

This is such a good topic! I think a physical dimension can be a really important part of a friendship. It doesn't work in every friendship, but if the dynamics are right and it feels good for both people, I feel like it tends to just happen organically, and I really enjoy when it does. The closest ...

Have you been to see a doctor? Physical symptoms that persist for this long are genreally something to consult a doctor about.

Like I said, one late pill is not a big deal. You just want to be sure not to make it a habit to take your pills randomly all over the place, but it doesn't sound like you are doing that

I'm sorry to hear that your friends did not believe you. :( But if your mother is supportive, maybe you can give talking to her another try? When it comes to support systems, it's usually better to have more than one person in it, especially if that someone is a person we are dating. I think what yo...

So just to make sure I understand correctly, you started the new pack right after the placebo week of the old pack finished, with no break in between? The only difference is that you should have taken the pill at 6am but switched that time to 10pam on that same day? Normally, if you switch pills wit...