Search found 9031 matches
- Mon Jun 03, 2024 7:30 am
- Forum: Ask Us!
- Topic: Relationship
- Replies: 57
- Views: 28803
Re: Relationship
Hi Skybushh, I will say that some of this sounds like it's looping back to the issues you've been trying to work on in therapy (that nebulous feeling that if people knew who we "really" were deep down they'd leave us is often a symptom of things like anxiety or depression), so I do think s...
- Sat Jun 01, 2024 10:38 am
- Forum: Ask Us!
- Topic: Relationship
- Replies: 57
- Views: 28803
Re: Relationship
So, that's functionally doing the same thing; she's asking you to follow her rules for what you fantasize about, rather than understanding and being okay with the fact that she can't, and shouldn't, control what you fantasize about. It's incredibly kind and respectful to want to follow a partners pr...
- Sat Jun 01, 2024 10:24 am
- Forum: Ask Us!
- Topic: Fantasy issues
- Replies: 30
- Views: 4218
Re: Fantasy issues
I want to add that it doesn't sound at all like time has been wasted; it sounds more like you have a lot of things to untangle, and that doing so with the available resources is taking longer than it ideally would. That's not you wasting time; to me, that sounds like you doing the often hard and som...
- Sat Jun 01, 2024 10:10 am
- Forum: Ask Us!
- Topic: Relationship
- Replies: 57
- Views: 28803
Re: Relationship
Hi Skybushh, To be frank, if a partner is telling us what we are or are not allowed to think about, including our fantasies, that's actually a red flag to me. We can certainly ask our partners to treat us with respect, or work with them to build relationship dynamics that are healthy and work for bo...
- Fri May 31, 2024 7:33 am
- Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
- Topic: Wanting a higher sex drive and appreciation of sexy stuff
- Replies: 6
- Views: 246
Re: Wanting a higher sex drive and appreciation of sexy stuff
Hi ConfusedGrape, In addition to all the good advice Willa gave, I want to add that while it's certainly a catchy term, "girl horny" isn't all that useful an idea. For starters, regardless of gender we're all experiencing fluctuations in hormones throughout the day, and the kind of libido ...
- Fri May 31, 2024 7:23 am
- Forum: Ask Us!
- Topic: Gender Identity
- Replies: 1
- Views: 111
Re: Gender Identity
Hi Skybushh, There are indeed things you can do to explore this, and I'm so glad you feel comfortable enough here to ask about them! The first piece I recommend is this one, just because I think coming at this process with this mindset can take at least some of the stress out of it: Gender Confusion...
- Fri May 31, 2024 7:07 am
- Forum: Ask Us!
- Topic: I do not get any sexual pleasure from sex or masturbation.
- Replies: 9
- Views: 307
Re: I do not get any sexual pleasure from sex or masturbation.
That does sound frustrating! Taking a swab is often part of a sexual health exam, but it shouldn't be the whole of it. I will say that, if this about a lack of pleasure rather than active pain during intercourse or masturbation, that's another indicator that there is likely a mental or emotional com...
- Thu May 30, 2024 12:00 pm
- Forum: Ask Us!
- Topic: I do not get any sexual pleasure from sex or masturbation.
- Replies: 9
- Views: 307
Re: I do not get any sexual pleasure from sex or masturbation.
I suspect that because struggles with pleasure are as often, if not more often, about our minds, that's why your OB-GYN suggested it. But if you think there could be an underlying physical cause, you could certainly as him to help you rule that out via examination. So, I think your next step is to t...
- Thu May 30, 2024 11:38 am
- Forum: Ask Us!
- Topic: I do not get any sexual pleasure from sex or masturbation.
- Replies: 9
- Views: 307
Re: I do not get any sexual pleasure from sex or masturbation.
Hi TahjTahj, I'm sorry that when you've raised this in the past with doctors, you've been ignored or dismissed. It does sound like your OB-GYN is taking it seriously, hence her recommendation of a sex therapist. Do you think you could ask her for a referral or recommendation of a specific person? Or...
- Tue May 28, 2024 10:11 am
- Forum: Relationships
- Topic: My parents don't want me to have sex
- Replies: 12
- Views: 365
Re: My parents don't want me to have sex
Hi Renee, So, the fact that your parents both actively signed you up for an actual sex ed class, and that they were willing to voice their concerns about this friend to you, suggests to me that there might be a way to talk to them about all this that doesn't explode the relationship. Is your partner...
- Tue May 28, 2024 9:46 am
- Forum: Ask Us!
- Topic: Fantasy issues
- Replies: 30
- Views: 4218
Re: Fantasy issues
Hi iLilli, If you think that different form of masturbation is likely to feel good to you, then I would give it a try to see how it goes! You know, given that your experience of noticing sensations in your body tends to be a negative one, I wonder if it would help to more broadly explore what it's l...
- Tue May 28, 2024 8:22 am
- Forum: Sexual Health
- Topic: will pregnancy tests work the same for me even tho im on T
- Replies: 3
- Views: 173
Re: will pregnancy tests work the same for me even tho im on T
Hi colonelcornball, I'm glad Andy's answer was helpful! I do want to add that while it's good to have a plan for what to do if a condom breaks (which becomes way less likely if you follow all the steps for correct use outlined here: All the Barriers! All the Time! ), forgetting a condom isn't really...
- Tue May 28, 2024 8:15 am
- Forum: Gender
- Topic: feeling guilty
- Replies: 7
- Views: 211
Re: feeling guilty
Okay! So, the "Becoming Out" piece Kier linked you to has a section on safety planning as part of coming out. Looking at that, are there steps Liz (the author) recommends that feel doable to you, or like you know how to start putting them in place? As far as meeting other queer folks, I th...
- Tue May 28, 2024 7:52 am
- Forum: Gender
- Topic: feeling guilty
- Replies: 7
- Views: 211
Re: feeling guilty
Got it. Would it be helpful to talk about making that safety plan? Like I said, I'm really hoping it ends up not being needed, but having it can take away some of the anxiety attached to coming out, as well as make it so that if things go badly, you're not scrambling to come up with a plan. Can you ...
- Tue May 28, 2024 7:40 am
- Forum: Gender
- Topic: feeling guilty
- Replies: 7
- Views: 211
Re: feeling guilty
Hi rodya, I would absolutely continue with your appointment and your planned timeline for starting gender affirming care. It's very kind of you to be mindful that there are other things going on in your family, but there's also the fact that you're part of that family and your needs matter in it too...
- Mon May 27, 2024 2:28 pm
- Forum: Bodies
- Topic: Concern with anatomy
- Replies: 8
- Views: 787
Re: Concern with anatomy
Hi Jax-in-the-box, I just wanted to follow up and add a few things. One is that, if you're able to be physically near your friend, we'd be okay with them using your account to ask questions and get support from us, as long as we knew that's what was happening. Two, if your friend thinks his mom woul...
- Mon May 27, 2024 11:16 am
- Forum: Scarleteen Updates
- Topic: When It's Harder to See It: Signs of Sexual Coercion and Impending Sexual Violence for Folks Struggling with Social Cues
- Replies: 0
- Views: 323
When It's Harder to See It: Signs of Sexual Coercion and Impending Sexual Violence for Folks Struggling with Social Cues
A new piece from guest writer Maya Strong: When It's Harder to See It
- Mon May 27, 2024 7:49 am
- Forum: Ask Us!
- Topic: Oral Masturbation Question and How to Manage Transmed Beliefs?
- Replies: 4
- Views: 966
Re: Oral Masturbation Question and How to Manage Transmed Beliefs?
Hi Demigirl09, I think you're right that, sadly, even being a member of the queer or trans community doesn't automatically mean that someone will be interested in or go to the effort of learning about the experiences of other groups within that community. Really, at a certain point all we can do is ...
- Mon May 27, 2024 6:37 am
- Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
- Topic: Dry humping
- Replies: 1
- Views: 141
Re: Dry humping
Hi Jaylen23, As long as there is at least one layer of clothing present, then there isn't a pregnancy risk. Too, when we're talking about pregnancy risks, not every situation is different, because what can, or cannot, cause pregnancy doesn't change, and whether or not there's a pregnancy risk depend...
- Fri May 24, 2024 12:50 pm
- Forum: Bodies
- Topic: i haven’t gotten my period, like, ever
- Replies: 1
- Views: 181
Re: i haven’t gotten my period, like, ever
Hi lb07, You're right that the fact that you haven't had one by now is a bit odd, although it's not completely unheard of for menarche to come this late in someone's teens. I can't say for certain why it hasn't come yet, but it may be worth bringing up with a healthcare provider just to check to see...
- Fri May 24, 2024 9:37 am
- Forum: Sexual Identity
- Topic: Am I Bi?
- Replies: 1
- Views: 150
Re: Am I Bi?
Hi dontaskneverask, It's pretty common for people who experience attraction to more than one gender to not experience that attraction the exact same way for each gender. That can be for a lot of reasons, including the one you suggested, which is that if we're relatively new to dating overall or have...
- Fri May 24, 2024 7:46 am
- Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
- Topic: Possible sti/std both virgin
- Replies: 3
- Views: 180
Re: Possible sti/std both virgin
Hi Yohanz, You can find the answer to that in the piece Kier linked you. Too, I think this piece will provide important, additional information: Can people with no sexual experience have an STI? I do think that, going forward, it would be sound for you and your girlfriend to read up on and talk abou...
- Fri May 24, 2024 7:17 am
- Forum: Ask Us!
- Topic: Oral Masturbation Question and How to Manage Transmed Beliefs?
- Replies: 4
- Views: 966
Re: Oral Masturbation Question and How to Manage Transmed Beliefs?
Hi Demigirl, In addition to what Latha said, I want to add a few other points that might help. One is that it's not inherently nonbinaryphobic to point out that the experiences of a non-binary person and a trans woman might be different in some ways if we're talking about a specific nonbinary person...
- Fri May 24, 2024 6:52 am
- Forum: Ask Us!
- Topic: Sleep Rape
- Replies: 1
- Views: 162
Re: Sleep Rape
Hi Sour_Snakes, This is tricky, because while assault intense enough to leave bruises would usually be something it was unlikely to sleep through, if you take medication to help you sleep, depending on what you take there is a chance that you didn't wake up when you otherwise would have. To me, that...
- Fri May 24, 2024 6:35 am
- Forum: Got Questions? Get Answers.
- Topic: Am I really Ace?
- Replies: 3
- Views: 177
Re: Am I really Ace?
You're very welcome, I'm glad my reply was helpful! It's great that you have a therapist you're working with, and I absolutely understand how something like assault can be painful or difficult to bring up in therapy, even if we have a pretty good relationship with our therapist overall. If it would ...