Hi Ginger! A vibrator can offer a different kind of sensation to the kind your fingers do, so you may just need to experiment a little to find the best way to use it. You're right that using a vibrator might feel better after your body adjusts, and you figure out the settings and find your groove. I...

Hi Itzxnikki,

Since you've been having difficulties finishing when your boyfriend fingers you, I wonder, have you been able to reach orgasm on your own?

If you're still confused after reading the resources, would you describe what happened? Maybe we can offer clarifications or advice.

Hi there, FullOfQuestions- don't worry, you're not a bother! Yes, I'd say it is possible for people to have multiple orgasms like this. I've heard people describe similar experiences before. You were masturbating in a new way, so it makes sense that your orgasm felt different as well. Usually just o...

Hi there, Starling1010! Don't worry about your wording, it's good. I'm a little concerned about the pain that you've mentioned. Experiencing pain isn't a normal or necessary part of exploring insertive/penetrative sex. Rather, it is a sign that something needs to change. For example, you might need ...

Hi Staysoft, welcome to the boards! You know, you don't have to be ashamed of being attracted to someone you don't like as a person. It happens, and there is nothing inherently wrong with it. That said, I understand why you would want to avoid masturbating to fantasies involving this person. Avoidin...

Hi Riblark, Orgasms don't always provide a very complete sense of release, so I think it is possible to have the feeling that you've described. Do you think it might help if you used a lower setting on your vibrator? And have you tried taking a break when you start feeling overstimulated and trying ...

Hi PotatoTheCatfox, I can see how that would make accessing therapy really difficult. But maybe we can find a way around that. If you attend university, you may be able to access therapy through your school. Some therapists offer sliding scale pricing, which could help you manage the cost. You may h...

Hi Spottedowl, Writing love letters in your journal sounds like a great idea. I'm wondering, do you know how much contact you will be able to have with him? If he will be able to access his email while he is in the military, you could send him these love letters. For other suggestions... do you have...

Hi PotatoTheCatfox, Of course, you don't have to tell us about anything you would prefer not to discuss. I don't know what your situation is, so I'm taking you at your word when you say that you've done something wrong. But I agree with Sam: even if you have a pattern of hurting other people in some...

Hi there, Confusedandlost Well, I can see how all this would make you feel lost and confused. Your explanation makes sense, but you're right that this is a complicated topic. Unfortunately, I don't have a straightforward solution that I can offer you. But don't lose hope. With time, and some trial a...

Hi Ginger, welcome to the boards! Thank you for the compliments, I will pass them on to the rest of the team here! I think it is great that you have a healthy and pleasurable relationship with masturbation and that you feel comfortable talking about it. Is wanting to talk about masturbation and hear...

Hi there, Spottedowl Congratulations on your new relationship! Communication can really do wonders. On that note, have you ever had a conversation with your sister about how you want to build a good relationship with her? Maybe talking directly to her about that and about your mental health difficul...

Hi Skybushh, That sounds so exhausting, I'm sorry you're dealing with all this! I know it can be really difficult to get such repetitive thoughts out of your head- sometimes minds don't respond well to arguments about what is helpful or useful. It does seem to me like these thoughts are linked to a ...

Oof, I can see how that would make your father a much less viable option. You're looking for validation? I can try to give you that. I completely understand why you resent your parents, given their behavior. I get why their assurances of their support or love seem like cold comfort. What use is thei...

Hi Itzxnikki!

I'm glad that you're comfortable with your current friend group. Just as a small reminder, if you ever have friends who discuss topics that make you uncomfortable, you have the option of telling them that you would prefer not to hear about such things.

Hi Ace_aym, You know, sometimes people can find a link between their sexual interests and events in their childhood, but in other cases, there's no discernable reason at all. Either way, there isn't anything inherently wrong with feeling aroused by taboo subjects. It would still be okay if the subje...

Hi Diegoneedshelp,

Don't worry- whatever this is, it will be manageable. I have some questions: have you experienced any other notable sensations, like burning or itching? Does your discharge look different? Do you shave there?

Hi GallantLandry, You've described some of your experiences and concerns here, and I have to say that I'm sorry you're going through all this. It seems painful, isolating, and confusing. You touched upon the idea that there is something wrong with you a few times. Honestly, I don't see you that way....

Hi Maroonteen, welcome to the boards! I don't think that you're being overdramatic about this. Your parents may have been brought up differently, and it may be hard for them to break down those teachings, but that doesn't change the fact that their actions and words hurt you now. Given your mother's...

Hi Terence, The best thing to do would be to request that they knock, I think. You might say something like 'Hey, would you knock before you come in next time?' If they ask questions, you can offer the kinds of non-commital answers that Sam described. Does your family ususally listen to you when you...

Hi Wynntxr!

That makes sense. Would you read the following article (Undoing Sexual Shame) and tell us what you think? It describes some steps you can take to manage and unlearn such feelings.

Hi Wolfishere00, welcome to the boards! Don't worry, this post isn't too long. I understand why you're feeling heartbroken. Your boyfriend may be having a difficult time, but this uncertainty clearly isn't easy for you either. It is good that you are trying to be there for him without pressuring him...

Hi there, Itzxnikki- welcome to the boards! i recently found out that it’s most likely my medication currently. most likely it being my mood stabilizers or anxiety medication. Just to clarify, did you learn that your medications are impacting your ability to feel arousal? I know it isn't easy to dis...

Hi Apismellifera! I'm responding because I'm on shift, I hope that is alright. It is interesting that your repulsion isn't related to sense memory. Do you experience discomfort when you think about yourself in hypothetical sexual situations, or when you masturbate (if you do)? Also, how long does th...

Hi Terence, Honestly, preferring the light in your room over the light from the window seems like a very neutral and unremarkable choice to me. Sometimes the light from outside can be a bit sharp, or not right in some other way. Does your family usually ask you a lot of questions over small choices ...