trauma

We all know that consent can be sexy — and also that navigating sexual consent can be tricky. Sometimes, disability makes it more complicated, so it's important to take some time out to talk about that as you explore the world of dating and sexuality through the disability lens.

Sex and sexuality can be tough to navigate no matter what, but it can be more challenging when your brain's wiring is different from that of your partners. It's important to establish from the outset that there's nothing "wrong" with you if you have mental illness, autism, or any number of other developmental, intellectual, or cognitive disabilities. You are who you are, and who you are is great! But it can make things a little snarly sometimes if you miss cues, get overwhelmed by your anxiety, or encounter people who think you're vulnerable and want to take advantage of you.

Before I say anything else (and I've got a lot, so go on and put your feet up: this is big stuff, so you deserve big responses), I want to make a couple things super-clear. One: you get to have whatever kind of mutually consensual sexual life it turns out feels right for you, even if that turned out...

(Michelle's second post:) I previously sent you a question on what to do with my ex-boyfriend. Now it's even worse. I don't know if he's being truthful or not, and I don't know how to move on. He's hurting me in every possible way. He had a pool party yesterday and my my best friend was there. My...

It's great that you're looking for information for your friend. Hopefully, we can offer some both she and you will find useful. This month, we have the benefit of a some extra hands to help with this section of the site, including some wonderful sex educators, writers and activists. For this...

I'm so sorry you had to experience a rape. But I'm glad you survived it and very glad you feel able to ask for help and support. The vagina can't really be "broken." A person with a vagina can sustain injuries to their genitals -- via rape, consensual sex, intentional genital mutilation, childbirth...

It was my personal mission to break the silence, not just for myself but for others who were not yet ready to speak. I wanted to share my story with whoever was willing to listen in hopes of making a difference in someone’s life. Look out world; I am on a mission to end sexual violence!

For folks who have experienced any kind of sexual violation--including medical experiences that have felt violating--it makes some sense that you might have anxiety or fear about pursuing further care. I don't know that I have The Answer for you when it comes to how to best manage this, but I do...

Sara continues: ...At first I was reading all sorts of tantra books and preparing myself for wonderful sexual experiences, but then the guys around me started taking advantage of my blossoming sexuality, and my first mostly committed relationship was to a guy who told me years later that he had been...

Abba: this isn't an odd question at all, and we do counsel users with rape and sexual abuse quite often. I'm also a survivor of rape and sexual abuse myself. Rape is a violent crime, and it is normal for any of us to experience trauma from a violent crime being committed to, on or inside of us. It's...