I was reading posts and noticed that a lot of them said how sex should be easy if the girl is turned on and relaxed. I have a smaller build and perceive it to be proportional in "all areas". I'm 19. I really enjoy sex and I have been sexually active for two years. However, I have found that no matter how much foreplay my boyfriend and I engage in, sex is difficult to start with and I feel sore during the end and afterwards. My boyfriend has also noticed a large difference in "tightness" between myself and other girls he has been with. We always use a good amount of lubrication and I do feel really relaxed and aroused with him. I don't understand how a guy can have a larger or smaller penis, but yet everything I have read on your site says that women have little to no variation in size. Does this mean that I'm generally the same size as the girls he's been with and that there is something else wrong with me?

I am 23 years old, and my husband and I have had a few arguments lately, about how he thinks I've been cheating on him. All is because my vagina is loose. We can have sex, say on a Saturday, and not have sex until say Wednesday, and my vagina is still loose. Or it can go for almost a month and I am still loose, barely back to the "tight" feeling. I was never like that before either, this has been happening for almost a year now. I was told that my birth control method (the ortho evra patch) could be causing something, since all of the estrogen it produces. If I changed my birth control, would it help it stop? I am not sure what else to do, I have never cheated on my husband, but if this keeps doing this, he might leave me because of it, and he doesn't believe me because of how I feel, and I can feel a difference when we have sex also. Is there anything I can do, tests or anything? Please let me know, I'm afraid and scared.

I'm 17 and wondering if there was anyway to make myself wetter down there, or if I could make myself tighter? My boyfriend tends to like sex more when im wet and tight. I do feel like im wetter if I drink more water each day (like 2 water bottles while I'm at school) Is it because I'm drinking more fluids, or is it all in my mind?

I get tight and loose randomly but I feel really small when we have sex less often for long periods of time. Like have sex on Monday, and then don't do it again till Saturday. I know the vagina naturally changes shape and becomes looser or tighter. But I want to know if theres anyway to make it tighter. I love having sex with my boyfriend, but I want him to have fun too (I know he does) but I want to make it more enjoyable for both of us. He tends to explode when I'm wet and tight, and we both enjoy that. Thankies to you if you can help.

My girlfriend came home from a party. I wasn't with her. When she got home we went to bed. Neither of us have intercourse because of our beliefs. We do "fool around." She wanted me to stimulate her as usual which involves inserting my finger in her vagina. Normally, it's relatively for lack of a better term tight. This time her opening was wide open. Open to the point the I could have inserted 2 or 3 fingers. This was not a normal thing for her in the time we've been together. Is it possible that the opening was like that because of penetration of something else, say a penis? I never said anything to her about it but I'm concerned.

And Butterflyeye asks...
Can a guy tell how many sex partners that you've had judging by the tightness or lack thereof in your vagina?

I have been with my boyfriend for 3 years. Every now and then he says that my vagina gets loose. I'm not doing anything for it to change sizes. He thinks I'm cheating on him and I'm not. I don't know what to do. I'm so speechless when he says whats going on, why is it like this. What am I supposed to say to him if I'm not doing anything? And what makes it feel different to him?

I am 18 and so is my girlfriend. We haven't had sex, but everything else leading up to it. The reason why we can't do it puzzles me. She is too tight, my two fingers hardly go in there let alone my penis. Help. How/what can I do?

I'm 16 and have been with my boyriend, also 16, for 5 months. He has only ever fingered me as I don't really like the thought of other sexual activities too appealing but feel I am ready for sex as it is a way to be as physically close to him as I am emotionally.

My only problem is is that my opening is really tight and can fit about 2 fingers maximum-- sorry this sounds disgusting? His friends tell me about his "massive penis" and I'm scared he won't be able to fit it in. We have spoken about sex and both agreed that we want to do it, but now I'm just nervous that it won't go as I'd always expected it because I'm too tight? Please help.

How long does it take for the "vagina opening" to get tight again after sex? A few days, a week? Do PC muscle exercises help? Say I hadn't had sex for about 5 months and then just had sex about a week ago, am I "looser" now then I would've been if I didn't have sex at all? And if so, how do I make it tight again and how long does it take? Is it already "tight" again...Does that even make sense!?? PLEASE HELP!!

I am a small girl and I am tight and it hurts if I try to put anything to big inside me. I have 2 vibrators and a dildo. One of the vibrations goes in with no hassle the other one is a little bit bigger and its not as easy but and I have a dildo but when I try to put the dildo in it hurts like a burning pain. I bought the second vibrator to loosen me up and I hope it's working... but if I took pain killers can that take the pain away during sex?

I saw this statement that one of the sexperts named Heather had replied back to a question, and I was wondering how it could be true the statement was the following:

A woman being a virgin -- if, by that, we mean has not engaged in any kind of vaginal sex before -- doesn't necessarily make any difference in the size of the opening since intercourse/vaginal sex doesn't permanently change the genitals in any way.

The last part is what I don't get, I dont understand, I've had sex roughly 20 times, and I can DEFINALLY see a diffrence from when I was a virgin, my whole genitals have expanded and are loose and there's A LOT of room up in my vagina now, before I could only get a finger if that much. AND also there are claims that people who've had alot of sex are more loose, compared to people who haven't had as much sex are more tight. So, to me this statement is VERY confusing cause to me it is very untrue considering my whole downstairs is permently changed. Please Help!

My girlfriend and I have been having sex for over 2 years now, but she is still very "tight", and really has to get into the mood before I can penetrate. It's almost as though we're having sex for the first time, every time. Sounds romantic, but it's a bit annoying for both of us (and she finds it painful if I accidentally push too quickly). With my ex I could slip a finger inside her without any hesitation, of course I would never mention that to my girlfriend. Once we're into it, there's no problem with going harder and faster, it's just that initial thrust. Is this normal? By being so gentle the first time have we possibly never broken her hymen? Otherwise, if we have sex more frequently, rather than maybe once a week/fortnight/month (for now we both still live at home with our parents) will she likely open up a bit more?

Me and my girlfriend were both virgins and just had a go at intercourse for the first time. Unfortunately, her vagina is really tight and is pulling the foreskin on my penis back causing pain for me and also for her. I've fingered her a few times to help loosen it up, and wore a condom to help with the lubrication, but it's just really painful. Is there something wrong with my penis, or just too much wanking?