pacing

It’s All Right: There Is No One Right Time to Start Dating

Many social norms, macro or micro, can make it seem like the ideal — or even only! — time to start having dating experiences is in high school. You may get the message that doing it any other time, even just waiting until you’re in college, puts you at  some kind of disadvantage. To go against that grain may inspire some social judgement of you and, at least in my case, leave you wondering if you’re just fulfilling a harmful stereotype about what autistic people are capable and incapable of doing. Even if it’s impossible to remember amidst the din of outside messaging world, there is no one right time for dating. That’s as true for neurodivergent folks, including those of us on the autism spectrum, as it is for neurotypical members of the world.

How can I ask someone out if social distancing rules are in place?

Anonymous asks:
I know you probably get the "how do I ask someone out" question a lot, so I apologize in advance if this sounds a bit repetitive. There's this boy from my school that I've liked for quite a while, and I was planning on asking him out before schools closed due to COVID-19. Since we're only acquaintances, I don't have any way of contacting him outside of school....

Am I not attracted or just not comfortable?

Anonymous asks:
So I'm in high school and I've been having a "thing" with this really sweet guy for the past two months. It makes me really uncomfortable that everyone seems to be so involved in our relationship! They all want to know about our dates, our hookups, if we've talked yet that day.... EVERYTHING!...

Is 13 the "Right" Age for Sex or Romance?

Gabbii777
asks:
I'm wondering what a good age to have a 'relationship' is? I'm 13 and I've sort of began to have stronger attractions both emotionally and physically to boys. I'm not sure if I'm ready for a relationship and I'm scared that if it doesn't work (for example, if I'm frigid or something) it will ruin our friendship. I know it's not much of a big deal but I just want some help and reassurance....

If you've been in a sexual relationship, has getting to any kind of sex usually felt too fast, too slow or just right?

I trust him and I want him, but things are moving WAY too fast!

Emme6678
asks:
I'm only 14 and a freshmen and I've only been dating my boyfriend for about two weeks and we have been moving pretty quickly. We have been friends for a really long time and I really like and trust him but I feel like we are moving too quickly. He has already fingered me and I've given him a handjob, and he's been talking about sex....

I'm 14 and sure my boyfriend wants sex: but is now the right time?

Hannah0035
asks:
Hi I am 14 years old and me and my boyfriend have been dating for 2 months on the 20th... we're mostly all teenagers here and young adults and can tell that guys want more than just make-outs, hugs and kisses they want sex... I wouldn't have a problem having sex with him....

Whoa, There! How to Slow Down When You're Moving Too Fast

Is your sex life or sexual relationship feeling like someone pressed the fast-forward button and now it's spinning out of control? Evaluate whether things are moving too fast for you or a partner, and then get some help on pulling back the reins and slowing things down to a more comfortable pace.

Feeling pain or feeling nothing at all = my experience of sex.

yougivemefever
asks:
I seem to not be able to feel any sort of pleasure from anything sexual. I'm 17 and have never been able to achieve an orgasm. It hurts being fingered. I've never been able to masturbate, because I could not keep focus or it started hurting. It also feels too awkward. When my boyfriend tried doing it, it hurt. He tried giving me oral sex, but that was painful....

I don't want to spend my life never being satisfied by sex and I am FREAKING OUT.

kt21
asks:
I've done my reading and I know this problem has been addressed several times... but I still do not have an answer! Until I read this site I thought I was the only girl who couldn't reach orgasm from sex (so thank you!) I now realize I am not, and understand that nothing is wrong with me, but it still sucks! I don't want to spend my life never being satisfied by sex....