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With everyone talking about it so much lately, thought I'd reprise the topic with some questions Tracy Clark-Flory of Salon.com asked me about sexting a few months ago, and the whole of my answers. To see her finished piece, you can meander over here.
Q: Where does "sexting" -- or for that matter, taking nude self- portraits or videos that they may or may not share with a significant other, friends or a crush -- fall within teenage sexual development?
Don’t worry: I’m not going to tell you not to post pictures of yourself drunk or exposed on Facebook because future employers might look at your profile, or tell you not to write about how "totally wasted” you got last night on your Wall because, again, prospective employers might read it. There are other articles you can read on that, and I do suggest considering the advice given in those articles. What I want to talk about is the other side of Facebook, the side that allows creeps to spy on you.
Masc magazine is a space for young men to explore how masculinity affects their lives. Masc is curious about how ideas of manhood are shaped by one's experiences and environment. Masc encourages expression and connection on a range of men's issues such as gender, stereotypes, sexuality and health. Masc helps men imagine their own ideals and ways to make them real.
A website where women of all ages, shapes, sizes and nationalities can share images of their post-pregnancy bodies so it will no longer be secret; to see what women really look like sans airbrushes and plastic surgery. What if the next generation grows up knowing how normal our bodies are? How truly awesome would that be?
I only rented Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist recently, so I know I'm behind the curve on this one. But I just had to say something.
I loved this movie. I loved it as a person just chilling out on her couch wanting to watch something good, and I loved it even more as someone who works with and for teenagers and young adults. When I looked up the director, I was unsurprised that I'd liked it so much. Peter Sollett also directed Raising Victor Vargas, which is one of the best, most honest and real coming-of-age films I've ever seen.
Yesterday, after working my second job at the clinic, I was effectively kidnapped by my co-worker Gigi and her ten-year-old daughter Sophia, whom I adore. She calls herself Big Sophia around me, my pug (scroll down this page for a visual) being Little Sofia. We wound up driving from their place to my neighborhood for dinner, which is a pretty long haul.
I'm posting most of the text of the lecture I just gave at the University of Texas through the NSRC Regional Training last week. A bunch of people there asked for it, and it was a great experience for me (how awesome was it to be in a room full of current and potential sex educators? VERY). So much of what I said really sums up where I'm at with this work right now, have been going and want to keep going.
If you are in Italy these days and spend some time watching the news and talking to Italians, you'll notice that there is one topic on everyone's minds and that's rape. In the past few months, there has been extensive media coverage of several rapes that have been perpetrated in the big cities. There has been a huge public outcry coupled with a large demand for more police presence and tougher punishments for rape. Just last week, Prime Minister Berlusconi responded by passing emergency laws to deal with the situation.
“Any girl can look glamorous. All you have to do is stand still and look stupid.” - Hedy Lamarr
Young women today have it so much better when it comes to sex than we did... right?
I feel very awkward asking this question. I am a 13 year old girl, and I feel like I'm trapped inside my own body. I have never told anyone about this before, and I'm really confused. Are there certain ways to tell if you're transgender or not? I feel like I'm more attracted to guys, but I sometimes have thoughts about girls too. I'm a little young to figure it out on my own, but I've watched my fair share of those sex-change shows. I also feel like I go on the Internet a lot, because there I am anonymous, and I can say I'm a boy. I know the works of sex, so you don't need to tiptoe around the answer. I couldn't even imagine telling anyone I know about this problem. I feel like puberty is hitting, and it's hitting hard. I can't stand having boobs, it makes me feel even more uncomfortable. Another awkward question. Is there some kind of strap-on penis that is wearable? If so, could you provide detail? I really appreciate you listening to this. It was really hard for me to say, because I feel like I've been lying to myself, and repressing these feelings. Thank you.
My girlfriend is uncomfortable being naked around me. She is beautiful and I love the way she looks. If she could see what I see, she would be more comfortable. What can I do to make her feel better?
Election day is almost here, three days and counting down. The few days before an election are typically the worst in terms of mudslinging because the campaigns know that people aren't going to have as much time to fact check prior to voting. Often the campaigns will attempt to make the most passionate arguments against the other candidate, and those arguments may contain a lot of fallacies, but the campaigners realize that no one has time to look up information and find out the truth.
I've recently realized that I have some deep seated negative thoughts about sex. I feel that it's dirty, wrong and I'm bad if I have sex or use sex toys. I've always had some pain when I've had sex but I thought it was because I was nervous that it would hurt, so I would clench and it would cause pain. But I just got my first vibrator and I couldn't use it because I was clenching so hard that it hurt to use it. I realized that it's not that I'm scared of the pain, it’s that deep down I have the belief that if you have sex, or use sex toys, that you're a bad person and that it's not normal. I know that this is untrue, but it’s impacting my sex life enormously. How do I overcome my irrational fears?
I'm so used to seeing TV shows with the "bachelor" who constantly sleeps around and never has a partner, or the one who's looking for "the one" and falls in love and looses someone new every five episodes. And at school, I'm used to everyone dating for a week, then more or less switching partners, or randomly sleeping together.
My question is: How many partners do most people have in their life time? And do one-week stands count as a small relationship? How short can a relationship be, and how long can it before moving on and finding someone new becomes really hard? Can people be in committed, loving, polygamous relationships, or have different partners for different things (like someone else for especially rough sex you wouldn't want to subject a gentler emotional-lover to)?
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