love

All About S.E.X.: The Scarleteen Book!

Get your hands on S.E.X.: the in-depth and inclusive young adult sexuality guide by Heather Corinna! Check out reviews, the table of contents and a myriad of places you can get your very own copy of the sexuality primer for every body.

Ready or Not? The Scarleteen Sex Readiness Checklist

Thinking about partnered sex? Do yourself a favor and look through our checklist to get a good idea bout the readiness of you and your partner -- it's more complicated and demanding than many people think, and knowing what you need to get ready can help assure that your sexual experiences with a partner will be as great for both of you as possible.

I'm becoming a Christian: How can I reconcile my faith with my sex life?

kaylinha13 asks:

Hello, my name is Christine, I am 20 years old and I have had a boyfriend for about 5 years. We have been having intercourse for over 2 years now but recently, for about 3 months, I have started going to an apostolic church and I am thinking about getting baptised and becoming a Christian. But I have a question about what I should do about my sexual life: should I abandon it until I get married now? Because this is really weighing heavily on my morals. I have asked many friends in my church on their opinion about this, and they tell me that premarital sex causes to leave an open doorway for the devil get in so that he can distort sex after marriage. I know that God will not love me any less or be disappointed in me, but if you sacrifice something for God, it will be so much better for you in the end. Everyone has heard that silly line: "sex stops after you get married". I don't want that to be the case...so will sex be better in marriage or does it really make a difference if I continue to make love to my significant other? Because this sounds like a skeptical concept to me... please help!! Thank you.

I don't feel safe with him: how can I change my feelings?

Becca asks:

I'm in my late teens and have been dating my first boyfriend for one and a half years. Early on in the relationship he broke my trust and later on has done a few things that have made me really uncomfortable: touching me where I've told him not to before, being very rough, and the worst, making a negative comment about my body. I've talked to him about all of this and it hasn't happened since but it's destroyed my trust in him, and my libido has disappeared. I now dread having sex with him because I'm always thinking about how he must hate my body and not respect me. Is there anything I can do to get me to believe he actually likes my body (like he claims to) or to learn to trust him again (and to be okay with him treating me rougher than I like?). I really love him but I can't stand the thought of him touching me at the moment because I just feel used.

How do I tell my boyfriend I don't think he's ready for sex yet?

erohwaremac asks:

My boyfriend and I have been going out for over five months now. In an emotional sense, we're a perfect couple. We love and respect each other, and get along incredibly. However, I am his first real girlfriend. I'm only the third girl he's ever kissed and done other things with. We "fool around" such as we make out, he feels me up and fingers me, and I go down on him, etc. However, I have essentially taught him everything he knows. He is a virgin. I am not. He tells me he is ready for sex, but despite the fact that I love and think the world of him, I know that he is not. Biologically he is raring to go, but emotionally he is not. I don't really know how to tell him this. I know it won't compromise the relationship, but I just don't want him to feel like I think of him any less. I just want his first time to be special and wonderful. And the only way I can let that happen is if he is totally emotionally ready. Deep down, he agrees with me, but his hormones are getting the better of him. I don't want to deny him, but at the same time I don't want to hurt him either. What do you suggest?

Love Letter

I'm writing this because someone told you that you can't understand or experience love at your age. If no one did yet, they probably will soon enough. I'm writing to tell you that if you've heard that, I just don't think it's true.

How well will condoms really work?

Lary2211 asks:

I'm 19 years old. My boyfriend and I want to have sex. He is not a virgin, but I am. The only thing that I'm scared of is getting pregnant. We will use condoms for sure and as my boyfriend has had intercourse before, I'm assuming he knows how to use them. How effective can the condom be to prevent me from getting pregnant since I will be having sex for the first time?

Another issue that is freaking me out is what if the condom tears or comes off? Can I guarantee 100% protection and rely on my boyfriend's experience with condoms? I'm worrying a little bit too much, but I really want to experience sexual intercourse with someone I really love. I would really appreciate your help and advice because I'm in need of some.

This is what sexual incompatibility looks like.

haiguyz asks:

My partner seems to pick and choose when she wants to fool around with me. Whenever I want to do anything, she doesn't, and if I get her to do anything, she complains the whole way through. When she gives me head, if I suggest things to do, she gives me an evil look, and tells me to shut up, like she's being humiliated. But just a few days ago, she took me into my room and gave me head without me even asking or suggesting in any way! She once told me she doesn't like for me to do anything to her or vice versa, but this just confuses me. I know it sounds like I'm pushing her to do these things, but I have nothing but the utmost respect for her. I just would like to be intimate with her more often. When I tell her this, she brings up that she doesn't really like intimacy. I'm so confused!

Polyamorous? Does That Mean You Like Parrots?

One teen's experience with loving in plural.

Are we addicted to sex?

cfishhyy2694 asks:

My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 7 months. We had sex after the 1st month because we felt that special connection with each other. Ever since the first time with him, I keep wanting more. I think I'm addicted to sex with him. That is all I think about constantly. He is the same way but for my sake (he doesn't want to be a father yet, if you get what I mean) he tries to control himself as much as possible. He can't always though. To be safe I've asked him to buy condoms but since we both realized we are doing it too much, he says we aren't going to do it anyway so why have them. Well then he comes over and we wind up doing it without a condom. It was a close call one time where he almost ejaculated inside of me, but pulled it out just in time. Do you have any suggestions on how we can overcome out sex addiction and try and be safer? I'm not allowed to go on the pill and my boyfriend and I have a lot of time to be alone together. We are just teenagers. Thank you for the advice.

Should I be concerned about his sexuality?

pagangirl asks:

Although I feel a little ridiculous asking this considering I should be more openminded towards sexuality and experimentation, I haven't been able to get it out of my mind. I started dating a man 10 months ago. I'm 18, he turned 26 around three weeks ago. He was married before, and she left because of her claiming to have been bored in bed and in general. Since the beginning of our relationship, I stated that I am bisexual and have been as long as I could remember. I asked him about his orientation and he told me that he was straight. No rushed answer, no hysteria. So, I believed him.

Months later--two months ago almost--I mentioned that I had heard that one of his friends had had a gay encounter. He shrugged and told me that he himself had experimented when he was 16, and had sex with another guy from school. He had anal sex, oral sex, and watched straight and transgender porn with the other boy (claiming the transgender porn belonged to the friend). He told me he couldn't kiss the other guy, because he felt repulsed, yet was able to perform oral sex on him.

Consent is Sexy

What is consent? What is sexy? Why is consent sexy?

First-Time Intercourse: It Was...Good?

We hear so many horror stories about first-time sex. Perhaps it might be good therapy to read about a first time that went well.

The Shape of a Mother

A website where women of all ages, shapes, sizes and nationalities can share images of their post-pregnancy bodies so it will no longer be secret; to see what women really look like sans airbrushes and plastic surgery. What if the next generation grows up knowing how normal our bodies are? How truly awesome would that be?

'American Youth' Photo Book

Submitted by Lena on Sun, 05/31/2009 - 15:58.

A new photo book entitled 'American Youth' was recently released. This glossy, 240-page photographic document features snapshots and extended photo essays on young people from all across the United States, from all walks of life: races and ethnicities, religions, sexual orientations, socioeconomic backgrounds, and more. The subjects' commonality is their age (those who come of age this decade a.k.a. people born between 1982-1991) and their country of residence.