I have a history of sexual abuse which I have just started working on in therapy--including repressed memories. I have never willingly engaged in sexual experiences and I am 25 years old. A few years ago, during an ER visit for extreme pain (kidney stones) I was given an internal exam which felt out of my control. In fact, seemed forced and I left feeling very violated. Now, I have never seen a gyn even though I am much overdue. I feel like I should for health reasons but I am terrified I will have flashbacks again if the doctor touches my vagina. How do I deal with this? It has impacted this and my ability to seek relationships because of fear of being touched vaginally.
MMkay, so I'm 21, being doing all the right things with yearly exams, getting the tests I need, etc. I just read an article about how the vagina does not substantially change after intercourse, but the first time I had a pelvic exam my doctor said "you're lucky you're getting this done here, a lot of college clinics don't have virgin equipment." What? If there's no substantial change (which I am FAR more inclined to believe) then this makes absolutely no sense. I would ask what she meant, but her practice has moved and I see a different doctor now.
UNRELATED question that I always wanted to ask her but was too afraid to- I was sexually abused when I was little, and raped when I was 16. That for me also confuses the whole issue of what she said- first of all, I wasn't a virgin, and secondly, (my real question) how was it possible she thought I was a virgin, as my guess would be there would also be some kind of signs of past trauma?
As a note, I'm in counseling and doing pretty well but I'm scared to ask because of the oh-man-if-my-doctor-was-right-then-maybe-I'm-overreacting/wrong problem... I'm usually pretty good at trusting myself on this issue, but this is one place I'm always afraid to go because it would be so concrete. (I also just moved for grad school and am seeing someone new and feel comfortable, but I will make a point to ask her too.)
I am 23 years old and I am extremely self conscious about vaginal odor. I don't like my boyfriend to perform oral sex because I am so worried that I smell bad. I scrub and scrub my genitals in the shower but an hour later the smell is back. When I asked my OB/GYN about it he said that he would check me for STD's but never explained anything to me. I haven't had an STD ever and I have had this since I was 13, what is it? How do I know if its normal? Please help!
My experience with sex-negativity and ignorance in the medical world. Adventures in having an ovarian cyst, coming out in the ER, enduring bad gynecological exams, healing my relationship with my anus and finally finding a good doctor.
Im 14 and still dont have menstruation .... Is something wrong with me cause I feel abnormal . My friends always tease me and I have already visited a doctor but she said she'll have to see my V..... but I refused .. I also have scoliosis .. does that affect or dalay my menstruation?/ PLS HELP ME ...
I had my first pap smear at age 21. I was told by the nurse practioner that I had to have one. It really hurt and she was irritated with me that it was taking so long to do. After she was finished she left the table and then she came back to the table where I was and she jerked my legs opened and I heard a snapping noise and thought she had popped my back. She told me I was still a virgin. But when I got home there was a lot of blood, I walked differently and my vagina seemed to be pulled down more between my legs. Is all of this normal to have happened for a first time pap smear? I feel like she actually raped me and that I have physically lost my virginity. I am becoming very depressed.
I’m going to the gynecologist with my mom in about a week for the first time. I just had sex for the first time about a week ago and I’ve decided to go on birth control. I told my mom that the birth control is to regulate my period because I don’t want her to know that I am not a virgin. i was wondering if i go to the gyn, will they tell my mom that I’m not a virgin if i tell them not to?
I'm 15 years old, going on 16 and I've been told my whole life by my Mom that I'm not supposed to have kids. I mean, in terms that I'm not able to. She was supposed to infertile (they were married for two years before me and there hasn't been anything since) and she's only had me. She told me that because I'm so much like her that I'm probably infertile too. I've never had the tests done. Gynecologists creep me out. For some reason, I've always wanted to be a mom. I'm really great with kids and I love them to death. I feel awkward feeling this way! Is this normal? I'm I wrong to feel this way? When I get older, is there any way that, supposing I am infertile, I could have a baby? Is it wrong that I want to be a mother so much? I've told one of my ex boyfriends (when we were still dating) about it and he just called me a whore for it. Is this natural? Is there any way to fix infertility?
Can a gynecologist tell if a girl has an orgasm?
Why is it that when I went with my friend to Planned Parenthood, they wouldn't let me go in the room with her even though that's the whole reason she brought me? I wanted to go in to see how it's like so I can possibly make an appt. for myself. But I'm scared and I want someone in with me. Will they allow it if I say I want my boyfriend or friend in there with me?
My mom says she wants to take me to the gynecologist to check my virginity. Is it possible that the doc will be able to tell whether i have lost it or not?
I am an 18 year old virgin, and I have been reading about labia on your website. I realize labia come in all sorts of shapes, sizes and colors, and many other girls have posted similar concerns. My labia minora are very asymmetrical (I know, normal) and different colors (I know, also normal). The one thing that concerns me is that the left side, the much larger side, is not sensitive, in fact, I can hardly feel anything towards the end of it. It protrudes beyond my labia majora, and I don't remember it always being that way. I think it became this way when I was thirteen, and then, it was very sensitive and would hurt if I wore my jeans to tight. Is this lack of sensitivity normal? Is there any way to regain sensitivity? near the base, where it is still more protected, it is still highly sensitive. My boyfriend of 8 months and I have recently begun to explore new physical territory, and he thinks I'm beautiful, but it's hard to enjoy the closeness if I'm self conscious about my body. Do you think I should see a gynecologist?
Hi, I am 18-years old. Currently, I am experiencing some brown color discharge that is thick and sticky, some what that looks like blood. Before my discharge turned brown, I have white, sticky discharge then greenish one. They are odorless. The situation has been occurring for past 3 months. Most of the time is 2 weeks after my period. Is my discharge normal or abnormal? Should I seek for doctor's advice?
This is really important! Okay, I need to know what I need to do to obtain birth control, by myself. My boyfriend and I have been sexually active for a few months but we always used condoms. Properly, I assure you. However, about a month ago, we both came to the conclusion that we wouldn't have vaginal sex anymore cause of how worried we both got about pregnancy risks afterwards. Now we're really wanting to start again. But I really want to get on the pill before we do. I just honestly don't know where to start with that. I have to make an appointment with a doctor right? Well, I don't know where to go for the appointment. The doctor that I've always gone to is like a family doctor and he even delivered me so that would just be awkward cause he's like friends with my mother and everything. And I don't know what to expect from the appointment. I really just wanna go in, get the birth control, and be outta there. But that's probably not the case. So what should I expect? And how much does the appointment, on top of the purchase of the birth control cost? My boyfriend will help with the money of course, but I'm scared if they're gonna do any tests. I've never had a pap smear or anything. It's hard that I have to do this alone. My mother I KNOW won't support me in this. But it's what I've decided to do and it's what I want. So I would appreciate some advice. /: Thank you.
I am a 22 year old female, but I have never had a breast and pelvic exam. I know what happens (I've read your articles as well as other websites), and I'm terrified. I don't like people touching me in general (people sitting right next to me, my parents putting a hand on my shoulder), and the only person who can touch me is my long-term (over 1.5 year) boyfriend. I've discussed this fear with my doctor. I'm also a very private and am not comfortable being around others if I'm not fully clothed, even changing my shirt with my roommate in the room - another problem I have with prospect of the exam.
My boyfriend and I have recently decided we'd like to have sex, so I've gotten a prescription for the birth control pill. However, the doctor said she will not prescribe it year after year without doing a regular breast/pelvic exam; she hopes that after I've been having sex for a while I'll become more comfortable with the idea of the exam, but I'm not. I understand why I should have this exam, so I've even tried just scheduling one to force myself to do it. Unfortunately, after a few hours I began to panic and didn't calm until I cancelled the exam. There is no history of breast cancer or any sort of reproductive problem in my family, and I do a monthly breast exam on myself. How long can I safely put off the breast/pelvic exam from the doctor? My boyfriend will come with me, and the doctor said she can give me anti-anxiety medicine, but I'm still worried even if I go through with it I'll become depressed afterward (I have struggled with depression before). Even though these things would help, I'm still terrified, and I begin to panic whenever I think of it. I know I should have had an exam already, but I'd like to know how much longer I can safely delay it.