I am from a country where dating is taboo. I was not in a relationship till my early twenties. The following may be hard to understand but I need to talk about it and know why I let this happen to me. It was my first relationship and I had little idea what to expect. Things were fine till my bf learned another man was interested in me and I might be interested in him too. That was the first time he told me he loved me and wanted to marry me. A torrent of emotional abuse followed. He started to tell me things like I was fat (I was not...I was 5'3 and 113 pounds) and not as pretty as his exes. He tried to tell me what to do with my life and how I was not that intelligent. I tried to break up but he wouldn't let me.
This is an odd question, and I really hope I don't disturb anyone here, it's not my intention. Anyway, I'm 16, and I've been raped, about a month ago. I'm kinda going nuts here, it's being sorted out legally. I'm not pregnant, I don't have any infections, and the guy's arrested, and I could really care less about the incident, except it's really stuck in my head. I guess this isn't sexual... but, it sort of of is, so I decided to pose it here. I have dreams about my rape, every night I can remember dreaming. It's really starting to mess with my brain, and I've broken down crying more than once, which is bringing me close to insanity in its own sense.
Am I going to need therapy, or some skitzo drugs, or something? I really don't want to be crazy over this, I just want to move on, get past High School, and get a life. I talked to my dad about it, and he said his dad had something similar, like a severe form of PTSD after he got back from serving in Vietnam (or Korea, I forget... We were talking about -my- insanity, sorry, I forget). Said his dad had flashbacks sometimes, which I guess would qualify for these dreams. I know you guys aren't psychiatrists, so I won't bore you with the specifics; it's just like a replay of the rape, over and over. Sometimes a few things are different, sometimes I'm watching it happen, sometimes it's just how it happened.
Am I insane, or unstable, or just having nightmares? Sorry if this is the wrong place to ask it, but a friend of mine said the help here was really cool, but I mean, I don't know if you guys do stuff past pregnancy scares and diseases all that.
When I was 11 I was raped, got pregnant, and had a miscarriage. Now I am 14 and I compulsively have sex with guys who are older, and it's like I can't stop myself. Does this compulsiveness have anything to do with what happened to me a few years ago? I have tried to go to a therapist but my parents say that its too expensive, and they just don't care. Is there anyway that I can help myself?
After I climax I feel tingly all over. It's like I'm paralyzed, especially in my hands and arms. I can barely move and it takes me a couple of minutes to calm down and perform regular tasks like getting dressed...is this normal?