casual

How exactly does "friends with benefits" work?

Anonymous asks:
I have been looking for some information on what and how friends with benefits works. I am straight, does it only mean casual intercourse or can it be just things like “spooning” and holding hands? I am thinking of asking a very close friend if they want to be friends with benefits. But I am only comfortable with just cuddling or holding hands, maybe more but only if we both feel ready....

How do I ask for lube?

Anonymous asks:
It's been a bit since my long-term boyfriend and I (girl) broke up, and I think I'm ready to start dating. The problem is that even though I love sex, I have trouble staying wet enough on my own that penetration doesn't feel uncomfortable. We sometimes used lube, but it was hardly a *sexy* aspect of the sex....

Am I right to feel like a slag?

BellBrand
asks:
Heya: so I have always had really strong principles when it comes to sex and relationships. I always envisioned myself with a nice, steady boyfriend before I would do any more than just kissing. About a month ago I was at a party and out of pure curiosity (not drunkeness) I made the decision to let a boy finger me, but I didn't really know him very well....

So, About That Study...

Over the weekend, we linked to reports on the presentation of a study in our Twitter feed and on our Facebook about the effect of sex during adolescence on academics, such as college goals, grade point average, dropout, truancy and absentee rates. On Sunday and Monday, the piece got a whole lot of media and internet airplay, even though it was clear few, if any, reporting on it had yet looked at the study itself.

It's not news that mainstream media tends to do a poor job reporting on both science and sex, and a poorer job still when young people are involved. Here's some of what has gone unreported or has been poorly reported:

Are coldsores herpes?

anonymous
asks:
Do coldsores mean that you have Herpes? My friend told me that coldsores were a sign of an STI. I had my first coldsore when I was 9 years old and I was definately not sexually active. I haven't had one since but I am afraid that I might be carrying Herpes. I know lots of people who get coldsores on a regular basis and I just don't understand how all these people could have Herpes....

I'm 13 and totally sure I'm ready for sex.

Anonymous
asks:
I'm 13 and I know that I'm totally ready to have sex. I no that everyone is ready at different ages and all my friends are surprised because half of them cant even talk about puberty without blushing. It's not like I'm seeing anyone so I'm not being pressured I'm just so ready and I want the first time over and done with. Is this such a big deal?...

The STI Files: Pubic Lice

Pubic lice is also called "crabs." It's caused by very tiny insects that live in pubic hair and feed on human blood. Pubic lice are often spread through sexual contact, though genital contact or sexual intercourse is not necessary for transmission. I