Does Abstinence Make the Heart Grow Fonder?

What we are talking about here is celibacy, the deliberate choice not to have a sexual partner for any period of time. There's nothing ambiguous about that. Being celibate entails sharing NO sexual acts with a partner: any kind of intercourse (vaginal or anal), oral sex, manual sex, and so forth. In other words, no physical, sexual contact with others; meaning any genital (penis or vulva) touch, with mouths, hands or anything else between you and someone else is off limits.

Let's Get Metaphysical: The Etiquette of Entry

From both our personal experiences of our own varied sex lives, and in our work in sexuality with many other people, it seems pretty clear that really letting someone into an internal space in your body, or going into someone else's insides -- which we know might sound a little gross, but that is what's going on with this stuff -- is a fairly big deal for many people. So, what might make sexual entry different from other sexual activities?

Do You Have Any Children? A Birthmother Speaks to the Personal & the Political

"Do you have any children…?" It’s such a typical question to ask someone, and for many it’s an easy yes or no answer. For me though, I consistently find myself hesitating to respond. Generally when speaking to strangers, casual acquaintances, and even new friends, I opt to answer “no.” On occasion, I brave the consequences and answer the truth: “Yes, I’m a birthmother.”

My Corona: The Anatomy Formerly Known as the Hymen & the Myths That Surround It

The mythical status of the hymen has caused far too much harm for far too long. Last spring, RFSU published an information booklet intended to dispel some of the myths surrounding the hymen and virginity, including a new, improved term for the anatomy, the vaginal corona.

Vagzilla! (Or, All Genitals Great and Small)

If we're going to think of our genitals as big, any one of us, given the small range between them, we should think everyone's genitals are big. We also need to accept that it's ignorant or misinformed to think, presume or suggest that penises are big but vaginas are small, because we really are all about the same size. If thinking big is better for one sex, it's also got to be better for the other. So, if you or someone else is going to go on about some big penis, you'd best get just as excited about the idea of a big vagina, and make having a big ol'Vagowski just as cool. And if you're all hung up on the idea that the vagina be as small as it can possibly be, or is such a small thing, then you've got to accept that penises are small, too.

Why I Deeply Dislike Your Older Boyfriend

That older boyfriend of yours, the one who keeps pressuring you for sex, who's got you scared you're pregnant for the 38th time, the one who is supposed to be the grownup, but acts like the child? The one who seems to keep mucking up more and of your life with every minute that passes? Yeah, THAT guy: I have to admit that I am becoming seriously pissed off at that guy, for a whole lot of reasons I want to tell you all about.

Positively Informed: An HIV/AIDS Roundup

What do you really know about HIV and AIDS? How sure are you that what you know is correct or complete, and how much do you think it matters that you know about HIV and AIDS at all? Check out our extensive FAQ and get informed.

An Immodest Proposal

Let’s just say – just because we can – that we, all women, in every sexual scenario imaginable, are already past both the no and the yes. Let’s say that nothing even starts without that yes, and that when it is issued, it is firmer, stronger and more exuberant than we may be able to presently imagine it could be. Let’s write a new ideal sexual initiation script. One that's a lot more interesting.

It's More Than Just a Pound of Flesh

I remember when I was seventeen, I tried on some new ideas. One of my ideas was that notions of "right" and "wrong" were false creations of society, and did not actually exist. Yeah, it didn't make much sense back then, either.

Kate Greenaway is a Real Pro

Kate Greenaway is the Canadian director of Medical Students for Choice, a group of 7000 medical students across the US and Canada who are working towards improving school curriculums to include reproductive health training, especially abortion training.

What is circumcision?

For a long time, I've been hearing about something called a circumcision, and I know it has something to do with the penis, but I'm not quite sure what happens to the penis during the process. Can you please explain it to me?

Looking, Lusting and Learning: A Straightforward Look at Pornography

What IS pornography? Why do people use it? Should I like it or not?

Boys Will Be Boys...or Not? Straight Talk About Gender

The primary author of this article is Malcolm Gin, a 31-year old intergendered person - a person whose genetic sex is neither male nor female. Malcolm is a successful professional in the computer industry who lives in Boston with a couple of cats and a long-time girlfriend who helped to edit this article. In this article, Malcolm explains a great deal about sex, gender, gender identity, and what you can do if you find out (or worry) that you might not be "normal" in terms of your own gender identity. Read on, and find out what it's like to be a "boy" who isn't actually a boy, and what life is like for people with non-standard gender identity.

10 Questions with Jennifer Baumgardner

Jennifer talks with us about her new project about rape, which we're participating in at Scarleteen, what the project can do to increase awareness about rape and survivors, where she thinks we're at culturally with rape issues, and what young people can do to help transform rape culture and their own lives.

Kosher Sex: A Q&A on Jewish Sexuality

I don't know if you are Orthodox or not, but if you are, perhaps you've heard of a term called "taharat hamispocheh" (rough transliteration). These are the laws (halacha) of family purity, or so they're called. They cover life situations involving sexuality and sexual activity.

Activism 101

Want to step up and start standing up for the issues most important to you? Here's a few basics on how young activists can get started.

Eight Myths About Washable Menstrual Pads Dispelled

After a few years of being the postergirl for alternative approaches to menstruation – writing articles, being interviewed, doing workshops, selling washable pads to women and getting involved in too many party conversations on the topic to possibly count – something is starting to give. The truth is, I’m starting to get a little bit tired of being nice. I’ve lost my patience with trying to pussyfoot around the issue until women are willing to talk about their own blood. And so, as a form of cleansing for me and education for you – should you choose to engage in it – I have penned the following set of arguments dispelling the myths about washable menstrual pads and your period. So there.

Misconception Mayhem: Separating Sexual Politics Myths from Facts

Is abstinence the only real safe sex? Does pornography have a set and agreed-upon definition? Scarleteen’s taking the time to debunk some of the most common misconceptions surrounding sexual politics in one handy place.

20 Questions About Virginity: Scarleteen Interviews Hanne Blank

Hanne Blank is not a virgin. (She's almost 37 and she's been living with her life partner for nine years -- we just thought we'd get that out of the way.) But she is a historian, a writer, and an expert on virginity, having written the first-ever history of the subject, "Virgin: The Untouched History."

The 2008 Scarleteen U.S. Presidental Election Voting Guide

The United States Presidential Election is just around the corner, so it's time again for us to do what we can to help our users in the states best participate in this important aspect of the democratic process. We've got a well-organized and nonpartisan listing of everything you need to inform your vote, particularly in regard to issues central to Scarleteen.

To Jane & Sarah for Their 30th Birthday

Enough people don't talk about abortion. Too many people don't listen to those who do. I'm not talking about conceptually or hypothetically. I'm not talking about discussing this woman or that who you knew that aborted or did not. I'm talking about talking about abortion; intimately, personally. In public, not in secrecy.

Abortion: One Woman's Story

When I was 16, due to a very irresponsible pairing of an impetuous one-night stand and a few days of partying, I woke up one morning to discover I had mononucleosis and walking pneumonia. As if that wasn't enough, my period was late.

The Pursuit of Hope

It was my personal mission to break the silence, not just for myself but for others who were not yet ready to speak. I wanted to share my story with whoever was willing to listen in hopes of making a difference in someone’s life. Look out world; I am on a mission to end sexual violence!

Boys Do Cry: How To Deal With a Breakup Like a Man

When breakups do happen, as they almost inevitably will, they are rarely painless. Guys in particular are often surprised by how badly the end of a relationship can hurt, and are particularly vulnerable to feeling isolated, lonely, and without anyone to turn to to process through that pain.

Magical Cups & Bloody Brides: Virginity in Context

The more common meaning and implication of the term came to change around the 13th century and derived a sexual, sexist and moralistic meaning. With that change, the word now implied that staying a virgin until marriage guaranteed that a woman would uphold the family honor by passing from father to husband as an object that was owned -- her virginity, her own body, was a thing of value that would be owned by her father, until such time as ownership of her virginity, body and sexuality would be transferred to her husband.