Hi Heather, I just found a question from 'samy-baby' concerning rape when performing a google search for something unrelated as it caught my eye. I'm afraid you appeared all too eager to label the bloke as unsafe and 'stay well away from him', given that the girl openly admitted within the first words of her sentence that she gets her boyfriend stupid-horny then says "no sex", that's just cruel, and I doubt many men would tolerate it. I've made it abundantly clear with my girlfriend that if she makes the effort to turn me into a horn-monster, she should finish through or I'm usually very pissed off; not to say that I'd go ahead and have sex with her anyway. All I'm saying is you failed to advise this girl that if she doesn't want to have sex, then she shouldn't get her boyfriend horny.

I was at a party and got really drunk that I can't even remember what I was doing that night and all I wanted to to do was fall asleep. But this one guy I knew got in bed with me too and I remember we did some stuff and he tried having sex with me. I can't exactly remember if he did get it in. But I remember that in the process of him trying it was hurting really bad. Is there a way that I can find out if we had intercourse or he did get it in me?

I am a 14 year old bisexual girl. I would like to know how to have sex with a girl and NOT use a vibrator. I want it to be just me and her no object between us. I would like to know how to move my tongue when I am licking her. And I would like to know if it is possible to get on top of her and rub her with my own body and give her and myself pleasure all at the same time? Can you help me?

Having read several of your articles concerning "first time" sex, I understand that it may not (and probably won't be?) everything I'm expecting, and that you're "first time" isn't as big a deal as society makes it seem. But I would really like my first time to be special. Not necessarily perfect, but an event in my life I can look back on fondly. Is there anything I can do/should know that would make it more special?

By the way, I think this site and what you do here is awesome, and I am so so grateful that this resource is available. Keep it up!

I'm 17 and I have a boyfriend of 7 months, and we're both very much in love. We had sex 4 months ago and he didn't reach orgasm and I got the sense he was frustrated so we stopped trying until last weekend. We both really wanted it but the same situation happened where he didn't reach orgasm and I feel like it's my fault and that I'm just not hot enough for him. I never reach orgasm during sex but I always enjoy it and I want to have sex but the problem is I don't want to do it if he's not enjoying himself or feels frustrated and I also don't want to come off as though I want sex all the time because I'm his first girlfriend and he hadn't done anything sexual before me - not even kiss - whereas I was not a virgin upon entering the relationship, so I don't want to come off as if I'm a rushing things all the time. After all this, my question is: What can I do to make my boyfriend enjoy sex enough to orgasm? He has never finished during sex and I get the feeling he's frustrated with it and would rather I suck him off but I always want sex when we're fooling around and I love him so much I want us both to be able to pleasure each other at the same time.

Why do men freeze up when you ask them about watching porn movies?

I'm 17,and I have been dating this guy for like a year. We just started having sex, and the other day we were going to but he wanted me to give him head before so he would last longer...then he could not get it back up. He tried hard to but it just wouldn't. Was it me? Can I just not do it for him or something?

My boy friend is 15, has never had an erection and every time we want to have sex we can't. He thought it might be a medical problem but he asked the doctor and said no medical problem here. We have tried everything. The first thing we tried was dry humping and nothing happened and then I tried grinding him they say that can be very arousing but it didn't work. I let him look at porn and nothing happened. More suggestions?

I have fingered my girlfriend quite a few times now. I can only get one finger up there and she never seems to react, just stands there as if nothing is going on. Am I doing something wrong?

Me and my partner have been together for 5 months now. I have just recently been tested positive for an STI (chlamydia). My partner and I have never used condoms because I am on the pill. My partner went and got himself tested and his results came back negative. How is that possible?

So, I got my boyfriend really horny, and I told him we weren't going to have sex anymore today and that I didn't want to be fingered, but he put his hand down my pants anyways. I kept saying no because I didn't want it, but he's stronger than me and ended up fingering me anyways. Afterward, he said he was sorry, but this wasn't the first time, he always does it and he always says but you like it, like that's supposed to make it better. Is this rape or am I in a safe relationship? Because besides when it comes to sex, he's the best boyfriend I've ever had.

I heard the word "orgasm," but I don't know what it is. So what's an orgasm?

Does penis size matter in the breaking of the hymen?

I'm 14, and I really want a baby. I know how to care for them because I live with my niece and sleep in the same room with her. Whenever she cries, I usually wake up and help my sister. I'm very good with babies. I already have 10,000 dollars in the bank just for me that I could use just for the baby, and it is still growing. I am a virgin so this is not just because I want sex. I'm very mature. I make straight A's in all my classes I really don't have many friends, so it wouldn't matter if I would not have many contacts. I really think I'm ready for a baby.

If you're due to start your period and your boyfriend fingers you, can fingering stop you from coming on your period or make you a little late?

You say that condoms/protection needs to be used even during oral sex because of the risk of STDs. Do me and my partner still need to worry about this if neither of us has touched someone else sexually before?

I'm 18 years old, going on 19 and have been with my boyfriend for 2 years who is the same age. I lost my virginity to him and have never wanted any other person besides him. When we first started having sex, I was completely afraid of getting pregnant. I once thought I was pregnant and contemplated throwing myself down the stairs, though now I would never do such a thing. Now that we've been together for so long, and plan on being together for a long time to come, I've been having very strange thoughts.

I'll be in a store, and look at baby clothes or a book store and see baby books and think "Oh, it's baby stuff. I wish I had a little one of my own." Right now, my boyfriend and I live together, he goes to college and works part time and I just work. I have no clue what I want to do yet, so we decided to move and let him go to school since he had it all planned out.

Hey, I had my last period on the 8th of April. My boyfriend and I had sex on the April 21st, but he pulled out before he came. Now, I'm 2 days late for my period! I am freaking out big time, could I be pregnant? I checked the net for all the early pregnancy symptoms but none of them apply to me. I've noticed that the past week I've not had a lot of the usual discharge, but on the day my period was due I did have a lot of white discharge and the next day as well. Please reassure me! When should I really panic?

Is it a valid concern to be worried about my boyfriend washing his hands before he fingers me? I know he should if he has semen or pre-cum on his hands, but as a guy he hardly washes his hands. You know how some guys are and if I tell him he still won't do it. Could I get infections or could he spread germs that have been on his hands this way? I know the vagina keeps itself pretty clean, so should I do anything about it? Thanks a lot.

I've read that the head of men's penises are very sensitive, or the vein on the underside. But my boyfriend doesn't seem to be affected by it too much. In fact if it wasn't for the fact that he thrusts into my mouth when I go down on him, I would think he was completely unaffected. Could it be my technique or is he just really unresponsive or maybe even a little hardened by sex after indulging (with the same girl) in the past?