roles

Does sex have to involve penetration? The idea of it makes me totally sick.

whydoihavetohaveanaccount
asks:
Okay so I'm pretty sure I'm lesbian and the reason for this is that when I read something naughty straight stuff makes me sick. When I read lesbian erotica I like it... until they start penetrating each other, but everything else excites me and I know I want to have sex. If you are having sex with a girl does there have to be penetration? Is it unusual to not want it?...

Do these pants make me (look) trans?

guitargirl19
asks:
My early childhood consisted of Legos and Hot Wheels. In junior high, I listened to more metal than pop, wore hoodies and Vans shoes, black nail polish and eyeliner. Nowadays, I've been getting more interested in piercings and tattoos. I've never felt like a girl for the most part, but I've never considered getting some sort of sex change or anything either....

How can we have sex if he finishes before we even get started?

snapplefact
asks:
I have an amazing boyfriend. He's thoughtful, considerate and sweet - not to mention super cute - everything I've ever wanted. He likes me a lot, too, and he's always telling me how much he likes me and how beautiful I am and all that good stuff. The problem is, I think he likes me a little TOO much. We haven't had sex yet, but I don't know if we can!...

I'm bisexual, so why don't I feel exactly the same about men and women?

nathanielthegreat
asks:
I'm 17, male, and have considered myself bisexual for 2 years now. I find myself emotionally attracted to women and sexually attracted to men. I like women in a certain way, I like to be in relationships with them. I see myself having kids, many in fact. But I'm not feeling sexually attracted to them, except for a few but can't find myself to have sex with them....

Is something wrong with me because I like BDSM? Can I like it and still be a feminist?

alice42
asks:
For as long as I can remember, I have been turned on my imagining my own pain and humiliation. I am going out with someone for the first time now, and we've been together for almost eight months. Recently we've started experimenting with very mild SM-type things--tying each other up, biting, spanking. I love it, and so does he. But is this normal?...

Is my boyfriend going off me, or is this about his friend's death?

kirsty
asks:
Me and my boyfriend have been together 6 months. I'm 14 and he's 15, and we are sexually active. But lately he doesn't text me the same as he used to, I have to ask him for hugs and kisses whereas he used to give me them all of the time, and it seems that he's avoiding me. His friend died last week: I don't know if that's the reason, but I love him so much, I don't want to lose him....

Why does male sexuality seem so repulsive to me? Am I just too feminist?

Anonymous
asks:
This is more of a psychological issue, I think, than a physical one, and possibly unsolvable, but I'll ask your opinion anyway because this site seems pretty clued up and sensibly feminist and lovely. I have recently become disgusted with the idea of male pleasure. It's like I'm... too feminist to function....

Reciprocity, Reloaded

I’m going to suggest you look at reciprocity in sex -- the idea that one person gives something, so the other should get something of equal value back -- in a different way than you might be used to. (Excerpted and adapted from S.E.X., the Scarleteen book.)

Working the Kinks Out

A lot of false assumptions are often made when people are talking about BDSM. Let's start with a little glossary to be sure we're all on the same page.