dating

The news is full of the wrong ways to try to have sex. Forever we’ve seen high profile men – almost always men – chasing people for sex, abusively. For the last few years, some high-profile men have been held at least a little accountable for it, which means it is not always swept under the rug anymore. But now that the abuse is more visible, if you stare into that abyss long enough, it might start to stare back at you. You could end up lying on your bed wondering if being a guy while being horny is somehow inherently tainted and gross. Most of us want to find someone or a few someones, for relationships or hookups, but right now, looking at some of that foulness, it might feel like trying to find a partner is a minefield of red flags because men’s sexuality is inextricably abusive. It isn't.

It can feel like the world will end if you haven’t had sex or a sexual or romantic relationship by your mid-twenties. There are countless ways in which our culture puts pressure on young people to gain experience in romantic and sexual relationships. But truthfully, if you don’t have much, or even any, experience with dating and sex, you are not doomed to never experience romantic and sexual connection. The world also will not end.

A short, fast, sex ed summary about the bare basics of healthy relationships.

I love this question, because it's something I think doesn't get discussed enough, and while I think the answer is fairly simple, that doesn't mean it's easy. I know the thought of asking someone out can be intimidating even to people who've done it before, so when you haven't had any experience...

It sounds like this is really stressing you out. Hopefully I can help by answering your first question right off the bat: yes, this is normal. I think you're right that the lack of contact could have been a factor in the cooling of your feelings towards your long-distance partners; that's a common...

You’re facing down a process that, according to a bazillion sitcoms and teen dramas, ought to fill you with dread: introducing the person you're dating to your parents and trying to peacefully navigate their feelings about your budding romance.

When people ask about lowering their standards and whether it's worth it to do so, the answer to that question depends on what those standards are. You didn't describe yours in detail, so I don't have much to go on, but in general, I'd divide what people tend to call "standards" into two types of...

Think you might be asexual, or just curious about the ace community? Alaina Leary has the details.

Young people don’t arrive at their conclusions about appropriate romantic behavior in a vacuum; they’re influenced by a myriad of messages, including input from the adults in their lives. Sometimes that input includes ideas that end up exacerbating issues around rejection and dating. One of the ways we can work towards a world in which acts like this no longer happen, a world in which people, and women in particular, aren’t afraid their “no” will make them a target of violence, is to make a concerted effort to help the young people in our lives learn to deal with rejection in healthy ways. With that in mind, we’ve put together recommendations to assist adults in doing exactly that.

Hi Lily, Loneliness can be a real bummer, can't it? Especially when you're in a stage of transition — getting ready to go to college, leaving your old life behind — it's easy to get a little anxious about what might lie ahead in the future. Take a deep breath, pour yourself a cup of tea, and let's...