Have you had a partner refuse to use birth control or safer sex? What did you usually do?

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Once I hooked up with a friend of mine (both of us girls) and she performed oral sex on me. We didn't use a dental dam, which was a TERRIBLE move since I knew she had many sexual partners and still does today. Anyway, afterward it hit me I could have caught something from her and asked if she's been checked. She said she had, but I still got an STD test just to be safe.
Very recently, we toyed with the idea of doing it again, and I firmly told her if we did we'd have to use a dental dam. She laughed because she'd never heard of one and found the idea bizarre, but I still refused to do anything with her until she agreed. We ended up not doing it. It still really bothers me though that she made such a big deal about it, and even got mad when I told her I didn't want to catch anything from her, EVEN THOUGH she knows how likely she is to have something because she never ever uses protection.
I'm actually pretty concerned for her health, but mostly I'm just relieved we never ended up doing anything.

I'd be completely offended if a partner wanted to have unprotected sex in a situation where it was needed. Like, you care THAT little about my health and future, as well as yours? No thanks.

Where's the option for this situation: I had sex with a guy who wouldn't use a condom, but only after he got tested, and I'm on the pill?

I was casually hooking up with a girl for a month or two with regular male condoms. Once I brought a female condom since my other partners and I have really enjoyed them in the past. They are less restricting of the penis, can be used with softer erections and they cover a larger surface area from a disease prevention standpoint. Win, win, win.

She took it from my hands, asked if I was serious, and then tossed it away onto the floor. I was completely shocked since she was a gender studies major so I was not expecting someone so closed-minded. Needless to say, I was not impressed by her flat refusal to use protection. I simply never bothered to contact her again.

Holy CATS.

Lordisa, that is one heck of a story. And also: GRR.

Editor & Founder, Scarleteen: Sex Ed for the Real World
Author, S.E.X.: The All-You-Need-to-Know Progressive Sexuality Guide to Get You Through High School and Col

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