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What is an orgasm?

Posted: Sun Jul 16, 2023 8:21 am
by mcc_ready08
Alright, so what is an orgasm? When I masturbate, I don’t know if I’ve had an orgasm at all.
1) Is a clitoral orgasm when it gets really really REALLY sensitive, almost like it can’t be touched at all. For me, I think it is like when you have it so stimulated that it can’t be interacted with anymore.
2) Does an orgasm have to happen when your legs start to shake? When I do my thing, it is only clitoral stimulation because vaginal stuff doesn’t really work for me.
3) How do you know when you’ve finished? I have never came before so I don’t know what to do, or when the appropriate time is to stop.
4) How do you cum? What does it feel like? I want fun after vaginal play or whatever it’s called, but I don’t know how to do it.
I am just trying to figure myself out, and if anyone has any information about this, please let me know!

Re: What is an orgasm?

Posted: Sun Jul 16, 2023 12:49 pm
by Carly
Hey mcc_ready08 -- welcome to the boards! I'm happy to help and start on your questions. Something I want to emphasize up top here though is that bodies are all very, very different so it can be hard to pinpoint exact answers to some of what you've written. I'll do my best, and I'll also link you to some stuff that might be helpful!

When people say clitoral orgasm, they usually mean experiencing an orgasm from rubbing or touching your clitoris. Some people may experience the sensitivity you're talking about before, during, or after their orgasm. In general though, an orgasm is an orgasm and the distinction of "clitoral" or "vaginal" orgasm is more about what area of the body is centered in the pleasure rather than a "type" of orgasm. This advice column talks about that.

Nope, your legs shaking doesn't have to be when you orgasm or even be a thing your body does to indicate that you've had an orgasm. Some people experience this, some don't. I think Sexual Response & Orgasm: A Users Guide might be able to help explain this for you.

When you stop masturbating is up to you, and you'll probably get some hints from your body. Some might start to feel overly sensitive and touch feels uncomfortable. There's really no good or bad time to stop as long as you are enjoying what you're feeling and not hurting yourself. It sounds like you're in a period of exploration right now, so I want to pass along How To Have Your First Orgasm: A Primer for Cisgender Women. You didn't identify yourself as a cisgender woman, but I think this will be helpful as you're trying stuff out. It also has links to our most popular articles and resources about masturbation.

When you say cum, are you referring to "squirting"? Or orgasming in general?