It does, thank you.
For the record, what that psychiatrist told you was profoundly unethical, and whether or not it is true. More on what to do about it in a sec.
So, there comes a time in many people's relationships with healthcare providers where they have to have a conversation about how they feel that person's approaches aren't or are no longer working for them. You sound like you're at that time. It happens.
Mind, it sounds like in this case, it might be about both of you. It sounds like she's told you what she needs from you in order to do her job and like you are either unwilling or unable to give her that -- in this case, if I understand, that is asking her for the help you need. At the same time, it sounds like this hasn't felt like someone you can actually share with openly, for whatever reason. Not wanting to share the kinds of things with her you have shared here sounds like...well, you haven't been sharing with her what you need to in order for her to be able to help you with all you need help with.
I'd suggest you talk to her and let her know that you are not satisfied with the results of your therapy so far and are not finding success with the approaches she has tried (if I understand right, that's things like meditation or breathing). I would also acknowledge that you know you haven't been giving her what she has been asking for so she can do better for you, but that you don't know how to get past whatever barriers you have to being open and honest with her. You can also let her know that however daunting the prospect of starting new with someone might be, you'd like to talk together about your and her feelings about that as an option for you. I would personally also bring up what this other provider said to you, both so you two can address it, but also so that she can talk to this person about their highly unethical behaviour. You also could report them to your state medical board online:
https://gls.azmd.gov/glsuiteweb/Clients ... e9107da72c
That's something you can do in a conversation at this appointment on the 19th, or, if you feel moire able to do it this way, you could write down in a letter or email and initially share that way.
I keep hearing you say this person is nice and they care, and that's part of why you stay. But honestly, those aren't good reasons to stay with a therapist, especially because however much we may like them, they're supposed to be challenging us, which means that sometimes we won't think they're so nice. Staying with someone who isn't helping you to avoid the process of finding someone new also isn't a great choice. I get that it's daunting, I do, a lot of us have been there. But I also think it's been made quite clear that that avoidance doesn't keep you from having to feel and live in your trauma: that's going to happen no matter what. Too, look even at the title of this post: you say you don't have anyone else. At the very least, if you were getting anything from your therapist of value, you'd feel your therapist is one person you have. If they don't even count as a person you have to talk about things like this with, then I think it's very safe to say your therapy, for whatever reason, is very much not serving you and it's time to change something.
If and when you do start screening new therapists, one thing you can make clear is that you have found starting therapy very traumatic and disruptive to your life. They can then address that, and work with you to find ways to make that more manageable.
(Just so you know, I personally have to step away from this conversation -- and most other work in our direct services -- for the rest of the day to assure I am able to get other work done that I need to. But other staff will be coming in this afternoon and in tomorrow if you want to continue on this.)