a few masturbation questions

Any questions or discussions that you ONLY want to discuss with our staff or volunteers.
(Users: please do not reply to other users here.)
SillyMcGoof_
not a newbie
Posts: 254
Joined: Mon Mar 06, 2023 1:53 pm
Age: 15
Awesomeness Quotient: alot of things!! a bit too much to put here lol
Primary language: english
Pronouns: plural they/them or ask
Sexual identity: aroace and queer
Location: united states

a few masturbation questions

Unread post by SillyMcGoof_ »

hiya! long time no see!

ik ive asked ejaculation related questions like 50 times already, so apologies for that, but i just have one more for the time being (also i did look at some stuff here beforehand to see if that would answer my questions but i couldn’t really find anything so im just asking here)

so basically i was whacking off and after orgasm i continued to stimulate myself a bit bc i was still a bit “pent up”(?) ig, and when i did that it kinda made me feel like i had to “pee”? and then i felt some sorta liquid coming out of my urethra. i smelled it and i didn’t like. smell anything besides like regular vagina smell, and also it didn’t taste different so idk. but afterwards i felt this sorta release ig? not like an orgasm sorta release but after that happened i felt more normal so idk.

i will say that this time i did actually have to pee a bit before i started from like drinking water, but every time i have sex (which is only solo sex for me atm) after orgasm if i continue to stimulate myself i still get that feeling even if i didn’t feel like i had to go before. idk its weird bc ive only heard of ejaculation happening before/during orgasm and not after so idk if it was actually just pee or like my body just does that.

also ive been struggling bc ive been wanting to experiment with internal stimulation but ive been getting frustrated bc i can only fit one finger no matter how aroused i am, and if i try to put two in there it’s uncomfortable and starts to hurt. but like idk what to do to get it to “loosen” so yeah. hopefully all this made sense bc idk how to really describe a lot of this stuff 😭😭

so yeah that’s about it rn lmk what y’all think and apologies if it doesn’t make sense or if my questions were answered by something else here that i just didn’t see yet or something

thanks in advance!! :]
Heather
scarleteen founder & director
Posts: 9532
Joined: Sun Jul 27, 2014 11:43 am
Age: 53
Awesomeness Quotient: I have been a sex educator for over 25 years!
Primary language: english
Pronouns: they/them
Sexual identity: queery-queer-queer
Location: Chicago

Re: a few masturbation questions

Unread post by Heather »

Hello, again! Hopefully you've been doing well in your absence from the boards. :) And thanks for looking for answers on the site first! Appreciate you!

Ultimately, we're just not going to be able to tell you what this was. If it came from your urethra, though, it was either urine, ejaculate or some combination of both. That feeling that you have afterwards, feeling like you have to pee after orgasm, or just having some sensations around your urinary tract is common. The urethral sponge and other anatomy in that area all get involved when it comes to genital sexual activity, so they can tend to feel different once they have been, much like the clitoris or vagina can feel different. It can also feel more sensitive or reactive.

So, in terms of talking about fingers and the inside of your vagina, I'm not sure I understand why you are feeling frustrated with how many fingers you can comfortably put inside yourself. Do you have the idea that if one doesn't feel like much to write home about, that if you could fit two it would feel radically different? If so, that can feel different, sure, but not usually in much more than a pretty subtle way unless we're talking about something like ALL the fingers. Chances are if this feels underwhelming to you it's less about what you're doing and more about what you're expecting. By and large, that kind of activity all by itself often won't do much for most people, because the inside of the vagina isn't where the richest bundles of sensory nerve endings are in your genital system.
Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has. - Margaret Mead
SillyMcGoof_
not a newbie
Posts: 254
Joined: Mon Mar 06, 2023 1:53 pm
Age: 15
Awesomeness Quotient: alot of things!! a bit too much to put here lol
Primary language: english
Pronouns: plural they/them or ask
Sexual identity: aroace and queer
Location: united states

Re: a few masturbation questions

Unread post by SillyMcGoof_ »

hiya!

that makes sense! thanks!

in terms of the other thing, yeah that’s basically it. ig its also bc i see other people with vulvas able to fit more and ig i feel kinda insecure about the fact that i cant do that?? idk its weird bc i dont have any interest in being penetrated by someone else (in fact im interested in being the one doing the penetrating) so idrk why i feel this way
Sam W
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 9728
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 32
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Desert

Re: a few masturbation questions

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi SillyMcGoof,

You know, when we see images in porn or other places of people fitting something large--like lots of fingers or a sex toy--into the vaginal canal, the detail we're usually not seeing is all the time, and lube, it to for them to get to the point where they could do that. Which is why a lot of people probably masturbate by inserting fingers in a way similar to what you've experimented with, where it's only one or two; that tends to be a much more realistic option for a lot of us.

I hear you on that weird tension of "I don't want this anyway so why do I feel weird or disappointed for not being able to do it." In my experience, that sometimes comes from the way certain activities or bodily responses are presented as ubiquitous during sex/masturbation or presented like some huge achievement everyone should strive for. So even when you have zero interest in whatever that thing is, you're still ingesting that people who can't/don't do that thing are lacking in some way. Does that kind of sound similar to your feelings?
SillyMcGoof_
not a newbie
Posts: 254
Joined: Mon Mar 06, 2023 1:53 pm
Age: 15
Awesomeness Quotient: alot of things!! a bit too much to put here lol
Primary language: english
Pronouns: plural they/them or ask
Sexual identity: aroace and queer
Location: united states

Re: a few masturbation questions

Unread post by SillyMcGoof_ »

ohhh yeah that makes sense!! and yeah that is pretty similar to how i feel. it also doesn’t help that like its kinda been drilled into my mind that like “simultaneous internal and external stimulation makes you have better orgasms!! it makes you ejaculate!! its just generally superior!!!” etc etc which makes me feel kinda poopy
Sam W
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 9728
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 32
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Desert

Re: a few masturbation questions

Unread post by Sam W »

Yep, that really is a big reason we steer clear of that kind of messaging here; not only is it just plain inaccurate (since human sexual experiences are incredibly diverse), it also leads to people feeling crummy! I will say that, the more you're able to internalize the idea of "my body and it's responses to things are mine, they're don't have to align with some hypothetical other," the easier it gets to ignore a lot of those crummy messages.
SillyMcGoof_
not a newbie
Posts: 254
Joined: Mon Mar 06, 2023 1:53 pm
Age: 15
Awesomeness Quotient: alot of things!! a bit too much to put here lol
Primary language: english
Pronouns: plural they/them or ask
Sexual identity: aroace and queer
Location: united states

Re: a few masturbation questions

Unread post by SillyMcGoof_ »

i’ll def do that more!!

also kind of an update bc something happened and i dont think it warrants a whole new thread; so basically i was doing a good ol edging session, and when i was touching myself i suddenly like felt a build up of pressure (not like an orgasm but something else) and i felt liquid come out and drip down to my butt and on my bed (i was not expecting something like that to happen so i didn’t have a towel). i was like super surprised and just like “oh god dammit” bc i got it all over my bed. and when i orgasmed more came out. it looked like a pretty hefty amount too. not like enough to fill a bucket or something but a decent amount (which sucked for me bc i had to clean it up at like 1:30 am). i also got a sorta feeling like i had to pee but i dont think it was pee bc it didn’t smell (i went pee afterwards and smelled it to confirm jic i forgot what human pee smelt like (gross ik but it was for science))

so yeah that happened. was definitely an interesting experience
Sam W
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 9728
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 32
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Desert

Re: a few masturbation questions

Unread post by Sam W »

Oof, got to love those moments where our bodies do something we're not expecting! We can't say for certain what it was, but from your description it sounds like you might have ejaculated (although you could also have just been self-lubricating a lot, though your description sounds closer to ejaculation to me).
SillyMcGoof_
not a newbie
Posts: 254
Joined: Mon Mar 06, 2023 1:53 pm
Age: 15
Awesomeness Quotient: alot of things!! a bit too much to put here lol
Primary language: english
Pronouns: plural they/them or ask
Sexual identity: aroace and queer
Location: united states

Re: a few masturbation questions

Unread post by SillyMcGoof_ »

pff yeah for sure!! also yeah i think so too.

im pretty sure it wasn’t self lubrication tho bc it was definitely pretty thin (like a watery consistency) and came out of my urethra and stuff in like little spurts almost? (like it wasn’t a huge gush of liquid but it also wasn’t just a little dribble if that makes sense), and i dont think i could produce that much lube to the point where it made a decently sized puddle on my bed (not unless i had my vulva on it directly for a decent chunk of time).

i dont think it was pee either bc again it didn’t really smell like anything besides wet fabric and maybe slight vagina smell.

also is the sorta pee feeling normal when ejaculating? bc that sorta threw me off aswell but also ive seen some things that imply its a normal thing iirc
Andy
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 309
Joined: Sun Jan 02, 2022 2:24 pm
Age: 20
Pronouns: She/they
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Prague

Re: a few masturbation questions

Unread post by Andy »

Hi!
It seems like you have a lot of questions about ejaculation so I wonder if maybe reading a longer piece about it might be a more effective way of getting answers (and learning other interesting stuff along the way as a bonus) rather than asking them one by one here. And then you can come to the boards to discuss any additional questions that might arise from your research. What do you think about that?
You can either go through your past posts and our answers to them or search for articles on this topic directly on our main site (if you need help with the search Heather’s instruction here might be helpful viewtopic.php?p=69212#p69212)
As for your question, as ejaculation and peeing are quite similar processes in a way (fluid coming out through the urethra) the feeling it produces can definitely be quite similar.
'The Ultimate Answer to Life, The Universe and Everything is...42'
- Douglas Adams, The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy
SillyMcGoof_
not a newbie
Posts: 254
Joined: Mon Mar 06, 2023 1:53 pm
Age: 15
Awesomeness Quotient: alot of things!! a bit too much to put here lol
Primary language: english
Pronouns: plural they/them or ask
Sexual identity: aroace and queer
Location: united states

Re: a few masturbation questions

Unread post by SillyMcGoof_ »

thanks!!! apologies for having so many questions. its just kinda tricky bc some things i’ve experienced i haven’t seen covered or answered in any pre existing articles and such (not just here but in general), and im also pretty forgetful so sometimes i accidentally ask the same question a few times. for now i have just one more question (apologies for having yet another); is it normal to ejaculate like a second after orgasm? or just generally after orgasm? the few times it’s happened to me it like happens sorta when the orgasm starts to die down a bit ig but ive only heard of it happening to people before or during orgasm. i did look it up here and i did see something that i assume said yes to that but for some reason i feel i should have someone tell me directly just to confirm i suppose. my apologies if im being at all a bother to y’all ^^
Sam W
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 9728
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 32
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: queer
Location: Desert

Re: a few masturbation questions

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi SillyMcGoof_,

It's okay to have lots of questions! I think Andy was more trying to provide a place where you could dig in and get even more answers.

As far as the timing of ejaculation, while it's often linked to orgasm, orgasm can happen without ejaculation and vice versa. And if it's happening just a few seconds after orgasm, I would actually more or less count that as with orgasm.
Post Reply Previous topicNext topic