Crush

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hiImcrocheting
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Awesomeness Quotient: The fact that I won't give up something I love
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Crush

Unread post by hiImcrocheting »

So I've been having a crush on this person for almost one and a half year, and the weird thing is, I haven't meet them in person for 3 years.

I've known this person for almost 7 years now, we used to be in the same schools, so it's really easy to get to talk to them in person, however, we went to different schools later, so we only chat through text messages.

I think the reason why I have a crush on them is because of the similarities that we both share. I've been described as a more mature kid, so it's kinda hard for me to make friends or talk to other kids, not to mention I was also the class leader, so it's hard for me to fit in.

When I text my crush about all these annoying things, they said that they felt the same way in their class, and that they understand my situation. After that conversation, I just felt so understand by them, and started to developed a crush on them. They were also the only person that wishes me luck on huge exams, so it's our small tradition to support each other when an exam is around the corner.

I just wanna ask, is it weird to have a crush on someone that I haven't seen in person for years? I know this may sound like a stupid post, but I just want to get these feelings off my chest.
Sam W
scarleteen staff/volunteer
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Re: Crush

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi hiImcrocheting,

If this is someone you knew in person, have a lot in common with, and who seems really supportive of you, it makes a lot of sense that you'd develop a crush on them! While some people tend to only get crushes on people they see in person, plenty of people end up with crushes in long distance scenarios. Do you feel like this crush is something you want to act on and tell the other person about?
hiImcrocheting
not a newbie
Posts: 10
Joined: Thu Apr 28, 2022 3:19 am
Age: 18
Awesomeness Quotient: The fact that I won't give up something I love
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/they
Location: somewhere peace and quiet

Re: Crush

Unread post by hiImcrocheting »

Hi Sam
First of all, thanks so much for the reply!

I don't think I wanna tell this person about my feelings for them right away, since judging from my current situation and theirs, we can't really go on a date or hang out whenever we want.

It's just that I can get really awkward and only stick to academic topics whenever we text each other. I'm guessing it's because I'm more familiar with school stuff, and know that it's ok to talk to them about this, so that makes me less nervous? But that also makes branching out (in terms of convo topics) really hard.

I'm thinking that when we both got into college, it'll be easier for us to hang out. But just the thought of going out on a date with them makes me so excited and nervous at the same time haha.
Sam W
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 8129
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 31
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity and orientation: queer
Location: Desert

Re: Crush

Unread post by Sam W »

You're very welcome! And I think that's a totally sound reason not to want to act on a crush right now.

In terms of conversation, do you think it would help to think of some topics you have in common ahead of time that you could talk about? It can also help to focus on asking genuine follow-up questions to what a friend is saying, rather than putting pressure on yourself to come up with interesting topics of conversation.
hiImcrocheting
not a newbie
Posts: 10
Joined: Thu Apr 28, 2022 3:19 am
Age: 18
Awesomeness Quotient: The fact that I won't give up something I love
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/they
Location: somewhere peace and quiet

Re: Crush

Unread post by hiImcrocheting »

Hi Sam

Yeah I think I can try to do that! I'll think of something to talk about and prepare for our next conversation!

Thanks a bunch for all the help :D
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