Scarleteen

I'm having trouble with applying BDSM into masturbating. I know I'm young (14) but when I try to normally jerk off, I can't reach a point of orgasm because it's just not enough. Over some years, I found out I'm really into bdsm. When masturbating I have the strong urge to feel pain and be degraded. I try out things like choking myself and using clothing pins, putting on a collar but it's not enough. I'm starting to realize this is more of Letting out my frustration then I need help post. Maybe both. I actually try to limit myself from masturbating because in the end I can't really feel the pressure that I want to feel and it's annoying and frustrating and I don't know what to do. I'm also thinking of asking my mom or sister who I have a close and open relationship with, if they can buy me a sex toy but I always back out. I also wanna know if theirs people around my age who I can talk comfortably about this and maybe feel better knowing am not the only one struggling. UGHHHHH AND THEN IM SEXUALLY FRUSTRATED FOR LIKE A WEEK AND INSTEAD OF FOCUSING ON WHATEVER WORK, IM THINKING ABOUT FANTASIES WITH RANDOM ASS PEOPLEEEEEE, anyways that's all Thank you. (Sorry lol)

Hi Hazel1111.Angel,

If it helps to know, you're far from the only young person who's interested in BDSM; if you poke around the boards, you'll see quite a few people who are also wondering how to safely explore it as minors.

Do you find getting really into a fantasy helps with that frustration you feel during masturbation at all? And when you say you're not able to feel the "pressure" you want to feel, can you tell me a little more about what feels like it's missing for you?

If you're curious about sex toys, you could try D.I.Ying some: D.I.Y. Sex Toys: Self-Love Edition. If you want to ask someone in your life to buy you one, we can also help you work out if or how to have that conversation.