Hi jenny01,
I'm sorry to hear that you're feeling lonely, and that you have to figure out how to balance your social aspirations with controlling parents and a neurological disorder
Being young is hard, isn't it?
Here's my take: first, you and I both know that you're way too old for your parents to have so much control over your social life, even if you do still live with them. I think you should consider working on this aspect of your relationship, but since you're immediately dependent on them, let's work with what you've got: You say that they are concerned for your safety and that you can't really travel on your own, but you also alluded to the fact that they 'buy you everything you could want.' So, why don't you have a rideshare budget/allowance?
I'd like to know more about your romantic history. Have you ever tried to start a relationship with someone or tell them that you're interested? I ask in part because I want to know if you
have tried these things. I think sometimes people who are inexperienced can get caught up in comparing themselves to others and assume that relationships are just things that occur easily to others but not themselves. Unfortunately, however, a sex life is not something that falls out of the sky. So, let's discuss: have you ever told someone that you had feelings for them, or tried to initiate physical activity?
Lastly, on the matter of getting out and meeting people: I myself have been in this same trap of not having stuff to do and being unable to meet people. I would suggest some of the following:
- Go on Facebook or Eventbrite and look for free/low-cost events in your area
-You're in college? Great! Where are the college students in your area known to hang out? Is your college holding in-person or virtual events?
- I totally get if you want to steer away from using The Apps to meet people, but I would invite you to consider approaching your use of them for flirting practice. Learn how to approach people in a controlled environment, that sort of thing.
And also, since you brought it up before: what would your parents
do if they 'freaked out' over you using a dating app? Is this a 'they would nag and be super annoying' sort of thing, or 'they would cut you off or threaten you?' If it's the first one, then WHO CARES. If it's the second, we should definitely talk about how to approach setting boundaries and becoming more independent from them, because seriously, that is very toxic behavior.