Any questions or discussions that you ONLY want to discuss with our staff or volunteers.
(Users: please do not reply to other users here.)
not a newbie
Posts: 391
Joined: Thu Nov 07, 2019 9:15 am
My pronouns: She/her
My sexual identity and orientation: who knows
Location: n/a


Unread postby sky » Wed Jul 01, 2020 8:25 pm


So, if me and someone are together and they get horny and I don’t want to have sex what do I do? Same with texting, if she gets horny and I don’t want to offer anything what do I do?

Amanda F.
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 259
Joined: Mon Jun 24, 2019 10:16 pm
My Awesomeness Quotient: I love to go rock climbing outside!
My primary language: English
My pronouns: she/her
My sexual identity and orientation: Queer
Location: Los Angeles, USA

Re: Question

Unread postby Amanda F. » Wed Jul 01, 2020 9:29 pm

Hi sky,

This one is pretty easy - you don't do anything! You just say "Thanks, but I'm not interested in doing [X] right now."

It's up to you whether you feel like explaining. You can give a reason, but you don't have to. You may have heard the phrase "'No' is a complete sentence." That means you can just say no without further explanation.

A good partner will accept your 'no' respectfully. You communicating what you're comfortable with is a gift they should be happy to receive! Some people might not agree to a 'no' so easily, and try to get you to say yes. Learning to stand up for yourself is an important part of any relationship, whether or not sex is involved. We've got lots of info on that here: Be Your Own Superhero: Learning How and When to Stand Up for Ourselves

Return to “Ask Us!”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 16 guests