masturbation questions

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latte
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masturbation questions

Unread post by latte »

hi again!

i had a question abt masturbating while watching porn. i am a 17 year old female who's been masturbating for a couple years but much more regularly for the past few months - especially after i joined scarletteen! i really enjoy it and am always content. i probably do it two-to-three times a week. however, ive really only seriously (and successfully) masturbated to porn. though i overall enjoy it,ive heard a lot pornographic masturbation and some of its negative effects. im worried that ill get addicted to porn (i would say i havent yet) or that i can only experience pleasure when watching/ listening to it. any advice on how to navigate this? i havent tried any other methods for awhile because i worry abt my bodies reaction/ potential lack of it. i've also never been with anyone sexually so don't really know how i would react in a real life situation. i've noticed that a respond well to sound tho really make little noise of my own, if that also provides any information. please let me know if this is an issue and if so how to navigate it! thank you! :D
nicole
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Re: masturbation questions

Unread post by nicole »

Hi latte, thank you for reaching out! I am glad that you have been utilizing our services and resources. We have a great article that goes into sexual media and pornography, I'll link it here: Making Sense of Sexual Media. I highly recommend that you check it out! Also, if you want to learn more about other methods of masturbation, we can look into resources that can help you out with that as well.

Now, I do want to ask: what are some of these negative effects that you have heard of about pornography? I just want to make sure that the article touches on the concerns. Are you concerned with your body's reliance on it or how it portrays sex acts/gender/race etc.?

As for your concern about developing a porn addiction, here is an advice column that I think might ease your concerns: I'm an abuse survivor, and I'm worried about sexual addiction. I know this situation is slightly different from your's, so please let me know if anything resonates with you. Please take care!
latte
not a newbie
Posts: 6
Joined: Wed Aug 10, 2022 6:38 pm
Age: 17
Awesomeness Quotient: i can slalom water ski
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Location: United States

Re: masturbation questions

Unread post by latte »

hi! thanks for the response.

i definitely hear that the way women are portrayed in porn is often disrespectful and false and that most of the sex is extremely theatrical, dramatic, and "overdone." not providing and portraying the realities and proper context of porn is also a big issue too. i think my mindset towards how it portrays gender and sex acts, etc is pretty good: I try to keep an open mind and remind myself that this is, firstly and always, a production.

and i would love to try different methods of masturbation!!! I might try with smut from books, as I read a lot.

I read the second article and it made me feel a lot better, thank you! I think right now I really am exploring and not going overboard. however, I think my biggest concern is that I will only able to respond sexually while masturbating to the theatrics of porn, but i guess i just have widen my sights a bit haha. i guess my worry is that ill try something else and not get the same response, knowing how produced and manufactured porn is.
Sam W
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Re: masturbation questions

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi latte,

If you're ever curious, we have a two-part series breaking down the ways porn isn't (and sometimes is) reflective of what sex is like off screen: https://www.scarleteen.com/article/poli ... n_part_one

With those fears about only being able to react to the scenarios in porn, something that can help to remember is that, while porn itself can be theatrical or unrealistic, odds are that the things that turn you on about a certain piece of sexual media could be replicated with a partner in some way. So, while what we like in sexual media doesn't always translate to what we like in person, it can help to think of sexual media as something that's offering information on what we like and might want to do with a partner, rather than something that's impeding our ability to connect with a partner down the road.
latte
not a newbie
Posts: 6
Joined: Wed Aug 10, 2022 6:38 pm
Age: 17
Awesomeness Quotient: i can slalom water ski
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Location: United States

Re: masturbation questions

Unread post by latte »

hi sam, thanks for the reply. that definetly makes me feel better about the situation.

so do you think the fear that i will become reliable solely on porn (to feel pleasure when masturbating/ get results) is an unfounded one? if you do think there's a possibility of that happening, would you suggest I try other methods? or am I okay with just sticking to porn? let me know if that makes sense. thank you!!!!
Sam W
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 8342
Joined: Mon Jul 28, 2014 9:06 am
Age: 31
Awesomeness Quotient: I raise carnivorous plants
Primary language: english
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity and orientation: queer
Location: Desert

Re: masturbation questions

Unread post by Sam W »

Hi Latte,

I'm glad that was helpful!

If you want to branch out and experiment with other fantasies or media to incorporate into masturbation, that's certainly something you can try! But if you've found things that feel good to your brain and body, then I think it's also okay to use those; I don't think doing so is going to make you unable to enjoy other sexual things down the road.
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