Porn orgasms and comparison

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Arasyil
newbie
Posts: 3
Joined: Fri Apr 16, 2021 9:24 pm
My pronouns: She her
Location: USA

Porn orgasms and comparison

Unread postby Arasyil » Fri Apr 16, 2021 9:28 pm

Is masturbation like I see in porn real? like I know it's not "real" but can it be similar? Because in porn girls always like do it super fast and hard for like 10s of minutes on end and from their voices it sounds like they're having so much extreme pleasure and like they're right on the edge.


i know they're probably exaggerating but like when I masturbate it's nothing close to that. It's kinda more like i get aroused which takes a couple minutes, and then i go at it slowly, only really speeding up at the last like 30 seconds or so where it feels really good and I orgasm. But for most of the time it just feels like decently good lol, but nothing groundbreaking.


is this normal or is there something wrong with my body? it's hard for me to not compare myself to porn even though I tell myself it's exaggerated, because they always seem to be right on the edge with those extremely pleasurable feelings for so so long, it's like i wanna achieve that but it might not be possible?

thx so much

boosterseat
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 22
Joined: Tue Sep 01, 2020 3:36 am
My primary language: English
My pronouns: she/her
My sexual identity and orientation: Queer
Location: Delhi

Re: Porn orgasms and comparison

Unread postby boosterseat » Fri Apr 16, 2021 10:26 pm

Hello Arasyil, and thank you for messaging us here at Scarleteen!

This is a very important question, and you're absolutely right that the porn actresses are exaggerating! Porn is fiction, it is fantasy, and it is directed down to the very last frame. Pretty much nothing about it is real. Depictions of women's orgasms in porn, including all the aspects you mentioned, are particularly misleading. Please don't feel like there's something wrong with your body just because you don't seem to be feeling the same intensity of pleasure that these actresses are acting out. Real orgasms differ from person to person, from body to body, and from situation to situation! Pleasure looks different for every single one of us, and that's the way it's meant to be. You're totally fine, please just keep exploring your own body, free of the unrealistic expectations that the porn industry throws at us.

Also, reading this article will totally be worth your while: https://www.scarleteen.com/article/poli ... tream_porn. I'd love to know what you think of it, and whether it helps you make sense of the issue!
<3333

Arasyil
newbie
Posts: 3
Joined: Fri Apr 16, 2021 9:24 pm
My pronouns: She her
Location: USA

Re: Porn orgasms and comparison

Unread postby Arasyil » Sat Apr 17, 2021 9:33 am

Thank you so much for the reply, it really feels so much better that I have reassurance that nothing's wrong with me. Like I knew everyone is different but getting it directly explained like this is so helpful.


And that article is great, I never realized that the actors are told to have orgasms at certain points, it really is like porn is just like a movie with directors and everything (and like I'm comparing myself with superheroes and then getting upset that I can't fly or something like that :D )

Especially this part was very helpful:
"Prior to that, the woman is often shown as being in near-constant ecstasy, despite the fact that, in terms of pleasure anatomy and other things we know play a big role in sexual satisfaction, the positions and acts are catered to the man’s orgasm. Whether the woman performer is experiencing (or faking) multiple orgasms, or experiencing no orgasm at all, is not often clear. "

I never really thought of it as being so focused on the guys pleasure alone.

This really makes me feel so much better about this, it would honestly be on my mind almost everytime I masturbated and made me feel like i was missing out. thank you so much, I have a lot to reflect on now

boosterseat
scarleteen staff/volunteer
Posts: 22
Joined: Tue Sep 01, 2020 3:36 am
My primary language: English
My pronouns: she/her
My sexual identity and orientation: Queer
Location: Delhi

Re: Porn orgasms and comparison

Unread postby boosterseat » Sun Apr 18, 2021 2:17 am

Yay, so glad the article spoke to you! The points you homed in on are super pertinent, too. Thanks for letting us know that you liked the article, and don't hesitate to reach out to us for any other questions you might have!
<3333

Arasyil
newbie
Posts: 3
Joined: Fri Apr 16, 2021 9:24 pm
My pronouns: She her
Location: USA

Re: Porn orgasms and comparison

Unread postby Arasyil » Sun Apr 18, 2021 6:52 am

Ok, I will for sure :)


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