In general, doctors don't tend to test for herpes unless someone has an active outbreak of sores they're concerned could
be herpes or if they know a current sexual partner has herpes. We have a bit more about herpes and how/when testing occurs here: The STI Files: Herpes
. It definitely sounds like talking to your doctor about your worries around herpes would be a good idea; hopefully they can ease your fears around this a little bit.
It sounds like you're both already in the habit of getting tested and using protection during sex, which is a great foundation for looking out for your sexual health. Do you have a sense of what, in particular, feels especially scary about herpes right now?
I do also want to note that it sounds like you have a lot going on at the moment; if having sex is making you feel extra anxious, it's okay to take a step back from it for a bit! You may find that some kinds of sex make you less anxious than others, or that taking a break from sex altogether until you're able to talk to your doctor is going to be the best plan. Maybe that's something you could talk to your partner about, when you're talking about plans for getting tested.