This is my first post ever, so I hope that I'm posting in the right forum!
Anyways, I was hoping to get some advice from y'all. I have a history of sexual assault/rape and it's greatly impacted my sexuality. I'm in my mid-twenties and am still a virgin because the thought of penetration has been too triggering for me. HOWEVER, I'm dating a man right now and for the first time in my life, I feel safe and turned on in a sexual setting with a man! This is really great, but also really confusing-- I really want to see him naked and sleep with him, but I also recognize that there are still unhealed parts of me that wouldn't be ok with that. The guy knows about my history of sexual violence and respects my boundaries, so the problem isn't him-- it's me. I finally feel safe enough to explore my sexuality with a man and so I want to do EVERYTHING with him, but I also know that I can't right now...I'm wondering if any of y'all have experienced anything similar and if so, do you have any words of wisdom? How did you respect your own boundaries after sexual assault while also exploring your sexuality?