Okay, so I've been thinking a lot lately about coming out as bisexual (though it's possibly more like pansexual) and athiest to my Catholic mother and other relatives. It doesn't have to be soon, and I want to have a plan first. Now, my parents are divorced and my non-religious dad already knows about my atheism and would have no problems with me dating someone of the same sex. My dad said I shouldn't tell my mother, but that presents practical problems as I live with my mother and want whoever I'm dating to be able to come over, and even if I didn't live with her, I'd want to be able to talk to her about any relationship I'm in.
The reason I'm talking about my atheism at all is because I originally became athiest after discovering I was bisexual and having a nice long think about what love meant to me and what it meant in the context of the generally homophobic religion I grew up in, I began the religious questioning that eventually led to my atheism. And, honestly, I think it'd be wrong to reveal one of these big parts about myself but not the other as they are so closely linked in my mind. Plus I kind of just want it over with and to be out.
Now, as for my mother, she has not expressed any homophobic beliefs that I know of (she's actually expressed some pro-gay opinions) and even likes my gay friends, but I'm still concerned that when it comes to her own child dating someone of the same sex, she'd be less supportive, though I know she wouldn't do anything extreme like kick me out of the house. However, she does have a history of referring to people I'm dating as "friends" when talking about us to others; I believe this'd be a problem even more so if I were in a same-sex relationship. Now, my stepfather is much more conservative, and he'd have more... obtuse things to say about my coming out as bisexual and an athiest, but I'm honestly less worried about him because 1) I don't care about his opinion of me, 2) "discussions" with him are good debate and assertiveness practice, and 3) as much as he'd like to think he's in charge of the family, he is not. Also, I know my younger sisters have some homophobic opinions and I know I'd get backlash from them. Certainly, coming out would cause extended-family controversy as well, especially with me being the most... unusual family member already. Though, I'm still sure my mother (and probably my other relatives as well) would have a bigger problem with me being athiest. Plus, I guess I'm also concerned some of my other very liberal beliefs will also come out and cause additional family tension.
My original thought about coming out as bisexual was that I'd wait until I was in or was about to potentially be in a same-sex relationship, but I'm seeing problems with that idea now. For one thing, I think that my mother and other family members might need time to adjust to the idea, and if they're not given that time, they might be not-so-nice to/about my girlfriend. And I wouldn't want to put any partner through that.
I'm also hesitant to come out because I recently ended an opposite-sex relationship, and I'm afraid my mother might think that's why I want to date a woman, instead of the fact that I've known I'm bisexual for about 8 years now.
My next dilemma is to figure out if I should come out as an athiest and a bisexual at the same time or at separate times and if at separate times, which should come first? So I'd appreciate any advice in any of these areas I've discussed here. I also read all the articles on here I could find pertaining to the topic, if that helps at all.