Confused

Questions and discussions about relationships: girlfriends, boyfriends, lovers, partners, friends, family or other intimate relationships in your lives.
ztyu1234
newbie
Posts: 3
Joined: Tue Jan 05, 2021 7:43 pm
Age: 75
Pronouns: me
Location: usa

Confused

Unread post by ztyu1234 »

Should I keep talking to someone that |
recently reconnected with since high school
about a week ago, or should I stop? they told
me they want to see where it goes, but also
told me that they wonder if it's loneliness
and isolation due to being single and
because of the pandemic that has them
drawn to me, they told me that they question
themselves about that quite frequently..but
on one hand they did invite me out for coffee
whenever we both have the time.. or we could walk my dog together (following the cdc guidelines) I've asked
them if things get better do they feel that the
novelty of me would have worn off and they
said that they don't think so as long as we
come to understand one another and they
would like for us to explore some hobbies
together. I'm soo confused. is this pandemic loneliness and i will be dropped shortly after things improve or something real?
Siân
previous staff/volunteer
Posts: 785
Joined: Tue Jul 04, 2017 6:10 am
Age: 34
Awesomeness Quotient: I ask ALLLLL the questions
Primary language: English
Pronouns: she/her
Sexual identity: Figuring it out
Location: UK

Re: Confused

Unread post by Siân »

Hey there ztyu1234,

Welcome to the boards :)

I don't have all the answers to what you should do with this person, but I do have some ideas about how you can make up your own mind!

Pandemic loneliness can lead to real connections. Yes, the pandemic has made a lot of people confront their own isolation, and reach out in ways that they may not have in other circumstances. Yes, some of those connections will fade, and some will stick around. Still, they are all real, and even temporary ones can be meaningful and important. For me, one of the unexpected joys of the last year has been a deepening of some relationships, and re-establishing of others.

What, if anything, do YOU really want from this? Your question focuses a lot on the other person's intentions here, but says very little about what you want. Would you like to have this person in your life? Would you like to walk your dog with them, or to get to know them better?

How did this person treat you in the past? I'm asking this because something in the way you've written this makes it sound like you don't expect them to like you or be kind to you - is there any reason that you don't trust them, in particular?
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