I’m dating someone in California and she gives me so much love and affection. However, I realize that love and affection cannot sustain a relationship alone. We don’t have much in common and a bunch of thoughts made me realize we are better off as friends. Also, I realize that I have to mainly be the guide and have to set the boundaries, which is iffy.
I want to do this slowly and at the right time. Not break her heart so much. I want to videocall her when I do this and still be her friend. I don’t want to do this over the holidays, not to ruin her days as well. I hope that she deals with this well.
How do I do this in the best way possible? How do I wish her the best as well. Like me, we did not have gfs for no longer than weeks and we finally did, she for more so. So how can I remind her that I still care for and keep my boundaries.
Ps. I feel guilty about wanting to move onto someone else. I have affections for someone else in mind (I’m poly, but I’m still planning to break it off with her), but I want to lower my expectations it WILL BE HER. I’m not breaking it off with my GF because of her.
Also, it’s hard for me to find a therapist, even after the holidays. I talked about it with Mom. I came up with this revelation on my own and this relationship is not want it use to be, I want to make it more like a friend thing before it gets uncomfortable and dull.